Crash

Did I mention something about self-fulfilling prophecy earlier in my entry?  It’s scary how it works.  As I drove up to NC for a trip today, for a brief second, my car crashing head first popped into my head.  I blew it off.  I’m a careful driver, that won’t happen to me.

A few hours down the line, some idiot in a red car is merging into the same lane at the same time I am.  I swerve to miss him, but my car fishtails, spins around and hits the wall head on.  My air bag inflates and my head hits the air bag.  That all happened around 4 this afternoon.  I’m fine.  Face a little scratched up from the airbag but nothing else is wrong.  My car…my first car…the one I paid all on my own…my own little dream car is totaled.  But I am a live and looking at the car you wouldn’t think I would be.

There are so many good people in this world.  I think we forget that.  Many stopped to help me.  Gave me phones when I couldn’t find my own.  Called 911, called my phone so I could find it.

My mom was so scared.  I think I was scared for her.  Now I just want it all to be over.

I just can’t help but think that if I left a second later…if I had stopped to eat lunch…if only…if only…

I think what’s freaking me out the most is the fact that I saw it happening before it happened.  I don’t believe in psychic stuff.  I don’t.  But all I know is that earlier, I pictured it in my head.  I pictured myself crashing…and then it happened.  Coinsidence I’m sure…but it’s still freaking me out.

Now I"m just hoping for a good night’s sleep.