The Life of a Co-dependent Person

i know why ive been feeling so vulnerable lately

so weak

i lost the temporary confidence i once had

i lost the one person i could talk to about everything

the one person i trusted most ever

my lean back guy

he was the one thing i looked forward to everyday

everyday i ended it with the thought, "im gonna see him again tomorrow, and we’re gonna have an awsome time"

he was my only support….he made me more confident and stronger and…happier

but now hes devoted to his christian life…..and i dont think i fit in that life anymore….

no, the future pastor cant have a gay wiccan "devil worshipper" now can he?

 

i dont think he actually believes that…but my mind is starting to think stupid things, stupid neurotic thoughts wont leave me alone….

i keep calling behavioral health, but i can never get an appointment….my school therapist really wants me to get medication for everything i have, but i cant get it until they screen me =/

 

smiley………

i love you….

but it has to end, and both u and I know

we have to distance ourselves…

or at least, i have to….

 

the only person who has ever understood me, the only person who accepted me fully

i dont think i will ever find someone who understands me or accepts me as fully as you

ill find love…someday…but i still dont think even HE would ever understand me the way you do…

 

ahh, co-dependecy is a bitch