It is Worse Than I Thought…

So let’s start with the good.

Even though he is relying on me to handle it all. Like this morning I woke him and told him to buy electricity (we have prepaid electricity and last night when I wanted to do the washing, I saw it was down to 15 units – not sure how long that would have lasted but didn’t want to take a chance, so I didn’t do the washing), I told him to transfer money into our Bank Account, as I need to buy some stuff and I will not sure my personal account anymore.

So he wakes up and then stops me from putting on my makeup etc. just so I can transfer money from his one account to our Discovery Bank Account. While I am doing this I decide to scroll through the past transactions… and I see how he was going to the liquor stores every few days, up until last week. I was so ready to start an argument with him, but I was in no mood, had lots of things floating in my head, and for the past week he has been writing on the White Board how he has been sober. Although he hasn’t been going to Zoom AA meetings, at least none in my presence or he has told me about, but he has been checking up with his sponsor and talking to me about his urges to drink and slipping a few stories of how he was drinking without me even knowing. And I even saw on our Discovery Bank account how he had made purchases at the liquor store. I told him that that account was not for personal purchases!

 

I mean I don’t want my husband to every lie or hide anything from me, but I don’t know I can handle seeing proof of him buying liquor, and buying it so regularly, when I am stressing about keeping the fridge full and not doing the laundry because the electricity if low.

Anyway…he has been managing to keep things going. Like he won’t carry money with him and I have his cards; although I know he can do card-less transactions and he has the bank app on his phone, and I know in the past even though I have had his bank cards he has made transactions.

A while back he was promoted to lead the UK branch of the business he works for. Slowly he has been getting all these benefits….unfortunately nothing financial. But he is happy and feeling for about himself and is really chuffed that his hard work is paying off.

• He is in his own office now
• He has some IT gadget “Alexa” – like “Siri” (Damn, has man become so lazy!) – He has always wanted one, I always thought of it to be a waste, humans have had no issue in switching on the light or dialing a number….

My Alexa Turned Evil. – YouTube  

 

So where was I…

 

  But OMG!! Give me a BREAK! Sometimes I just want time to myself and to just breathe. But now that he is all about being  and yes I have told him that he can tell me anything and I will listen and support him, but it can get so tiring having to be positive and encouraging all the time.