Again and again

I feel like I am in my own ” Ground how’s day”. It’s like I have lived the same day, everyday since January 2019. I don’t want to do it anymore,  but I have no clue how to stop it.

I just hate myself, like it seems everyone around me does. I don’t want to be so alone anymore but it really appears like I’m stuck.

IDK, I don’t know what to say anymore that I haven’t said here already. I’ve run out of ideas to help myself get out of my funk. I’m really defeated.