Friday 3/4/22

7:42am I was up late last night reading. I came across a very interesting chapter on intectualism during the 50s. I didn’t get to bed until after eleven. I didn’t mind because I enjoyed reading that book.

I had some very bad dreams. I woke up screaming at one point. But I slept good. I had a very nice aid who got me out of bed at six. I still felt very sleepy though. I slept in my wheelchair until breakfast. I had a sausage paddy, toast and got cereal. For drinks I had oj and a nice cup of coffee..

I’m a bit worried about the business with the credit card company. I know worrying doesn’t solve anything it only makes you sick. But it seems I can’t help myself. I was telling Chocolatechip this morning that I come from a family of worriers. Still only I have control over my emotions as an old therapist would say. But for some reason I worry about every damned little thing.

Other than worrying myself silly I am doing pretty good. Breakfast and coffee perked me up. I’m in no pain. I only had one incontinence episode after the aid changed me. I do not feel depressed or anything. It’s this thing with the credit card company is hanging over my head. I keep thinking the worse possible outcome will happen.

I talked with Chocolatechip this morning. She said somebody nocked on her door at 1:00. She had a hard time going back to sleep. We both agree that whoever is doing this is pretty sick. We also have a good idea who is doing this. It is either Keith or Carol. It seems too much of a coincidence that nobody bothered her when they went to Columbus. Now it has started back up again after they came back. We can’t do anything about it because there is no real proof.

Chocolatechip’s sister Elaine is coming up from Wheeling this afternoon. She was up early getting ready for the visit. I said at least you will have plenty of time to get ready. I also said it will do you some good to get out of the Looney Bin for awhile. They plan on going to Walmart,Aldies and Goodwill then eat at Bob Evans. I hope she hasa fun day.

10:09am I had a hell of a time with my credit card company. I could not hear them. I had to make two calls. I got better results the second time I called. They called my bank and I got everything straightened out. I can use the card. First thing I did was buy a book. Then I bought a new tablet from Amazon for $127.95. I am kind of spent now after dealing with Capitol One. But I will contact the nursing home and pay my rent this afternoon. But I need to chill for awhile because I feel so frustrated.

I don’t understand why everything has to be so hard. Why can’t I just make a credit card payment and use the card? It is not only with the credit card but everything else I try to do. No wonder I worry so much and suffer from anxiety over the littlest things. Everything is so complicated but somehow I manage to get the job done.

I’m proud of myself because I didn’t lose it and scream you fn morons over the phone. I was assertive and polite. But it was so damned hard to do this simple chore. I ask again why does everything have to be so hard?

One good thing is that I will have a bit more money than originally planned. I already bought one book A History of Christianity by Paul Johnson for $16.99. The tablet cost $123.95.  So far I spent $140.94. Rent will be $483.00. Total expenses so far is $623.94. Subtract this from $801 and I should have $178 left over. I plan on buying more books.

11:44am I cancelled my yearly subscription to the New York Tmes. It was l about to expire and the next bill was due. I felt I couldn’t afford the tablet and the subscription at the same time. I wasn’t reading the paper. I figured I could save some money to buy books. I bought a total of six books all by the same author, Paul Johnson. With all these books plus the tablet my spending came to %190.89. I’m not buying anymore books until the rent is paid.

Nobody in billing was available when I called the nursing home. I won’t be able to pay my rent until Monday. It will be late but it is not my fault. I also called the credit card company. According to them I have $684.32 credit a available. This is more than enough to pay the rent.

Well I took care of business today. I took care of the credit card. I set more than enough side for rent. I’m in good shape. It’s nice to know that I’m still capable of handling my own money.