I’m like the dude from the weakerthans

no matter what, you’re always me salvation tee oh dee, I go here late at night, hiding my hobbie like internet porn and inkling for it when I thought I was clean. youll fuck me tee oh dee when no one else will, I’ll call you up drunk late at night and you’ll succumb to my pleas for comfort. perhaps its your pretty red border or scent of familiarity. its clean any audience I once had has given up and I can respect that, therefore my longing to write only in tee oh dee could not be due fully to those who once read it. it must me something more. I think it’s your oral.

I returned to the hometown of Bullhead City, Arizona this past weekend. We brought along our Phoenix enterague and stayed in a hotel instead of with the girlfriend’s mother. We floated down the river and ate 2.99 steak and eggs at three in the morning. Every corner of that town is dripping with nistalgia. Every road and market and park and home has all these fucked-up-teenagey-angstdrenched-completely cinematic memories. If not from my teenage years then surely from younger. And what is this feeling I get from roaming the roads of a town I once loved like hell, but hated just the same? Ambivilant perhaps. Curious as to what might have happened if my Dad hadn’t fucked a coworker and moved away, only to have my brother follow and later my mother. and I stayed with the town like I owed it something, like a ratty comfort blanket I can’t throw away. so I stayed there with my grandmother while my family moved to northern california. and I fucked up lots of times until the parents couldnt take the fucking up and forced me to move. away.

oh, bullhead. if I lived there, maybe I’d work at that wells fargo inside the safeway and party at the river on the weekends. maybe I’d go to mad dogs sports grill and live in those apartments on ramar, the really shady looking ones with the adobe color paint. maybe I’d get pregnant like everyone else there does. have lots of babies and eventually get a job at the front desk in the flamingo casino, or better yet the river palms casino in laughlin. houses are cheap there. everythings cheap there.

a fucking scummy, scummy town. have you been?

yet returning brought good times fo shizzle. the girlfriend got her first tattoo- a skillet flipping vegtables with flames coming up and a banner at the bottem that says “I heart food”. she surely is dedicated to her profession. you would be too if you got as muching fucking praise as she does.

we were on the 11th floor. I threw the bible out the window.

I bought a digital camera