Monday 2/07/22

5:29am I had some weird dreams last night. I vaguely remember one dream where I was in the Mafia. I was head of my own crew. I was tough and a very dry dangerous man. Then the higher ups in the family urned against me. They ordered a hit. I had to run for my life and start over with a new identity. But the Boys sent men after me? They discovered my location. I was going to be killed.

I also had another dream about Overbrook Towers and it’s director. We were sitting on the benches smoking. People were all bitching about him being a terrible manager and not doing anything about the bed bug problem. I defended him. Then I lashed out at the people attacking George. I said all you people do is sit on your butts all day bitching. You don’t clean your apartments and wonder why we have bugs! I was mad because everyone shunned me.

I slept well despite the dreams. I fell asleep around 5:30. I think I woke up a couple of times but went back to sleep. I was awakened by a nice aid around five. She put me in a clean gown and helped me get in my chair. I had an accident as soon as I was seating. Aid was nice about it and changed me.

Well, I’m up if not at em. I should feel blessed to have another day. But I won’t hurt to that point until I have my morning coffee. They will not be serving drinks and until seven.. I’ve always said the time you wake up and your first cup of coffee is the longest part of the day. I will suffer until I get my caffeine fix still I’m above the dirt. I’m truly blessed

7:41am I had a pretty good breakfast of an egg and cheese sandwich with hot cereal. I must of been hungry because I ate it all. The coffee was Luke warm but I drank it anyway. Coffee didn’t phase me for I’m still very tired. I feel like I’m halfway between dead and alive.

Today is Monday. I will do battle with the credit card company again. I hope I can get help from somebody connected to the nursing home. The main problem is I cannot hear. I am hoping that I can get someone from the nursing home to talk to a representative on my behalf. Someone was supposed to help me Friday but they never showed. I hope to God I can get help today so I can settle this business. Please God, let me get the help I need.

This business with the credit card co is driving my crazy. I tell myself that worrying about it is not going to help. But I worried about it all day yesterday. This caused a major bout with depression. I can’t afford another day like Sunday. I hope to God that I will be able to get some help. Otherwise, I will not be able to pay .my rent then I will really be screwed.  Jesus, why is everything so hard. All I want to do is pay what I owe to the nursing home .

It is eight now. I will wait until nine then call the front office. In the meantime I will just sit and brood . I should try not to think of about it but it is embedded  into my brain. I can’t concentrate or think of anything else. Got to take care of this shit now.or I will really lose it.

9:04am I just got back from physical  therapy. I told my coach about my latest  tale of woe. She suggested I set it up where the nursing home can take my rent directly out of my bank. At least that way I will not have to worry about this next month.  I will talk with someone if they send a person down to help me.

I didn’t didn’t do very well in PT. We started out walking. I had a hard time standing. She wanted me to walk across the room. I made it about halfway. Then we did the leg exercises. I had a difficult time doing this much. I could h ardly move my left leg. I just couldn’t focus on my therapy for thinking about that damned credit card.

Well it is nine o’clock. The business office should be open I want to get this over with. I’m anxious and nervous as all get out. I’m thinking I need to calm myself down first. But that is a lost cause.

11:15am  I got great news!. I called the credit card co myself. I was able to get to a live voice. For some reason they put a ten day hold on my funds. I told them I needed the funds today so I can pay my rent to the nursing home. They set up a three way conversation with the bank, me and the credit card company. The bank confirmed my payment on the third. The credit card company made the funds available today! I can now pay my rent.

This is a tremendous load off my mind. I was so worried and upset that I wouldn’t be able to pay my rent. But it is all taken care of. Than you dear lord! I’m going to defuse for awhile eat my lunch then call the office again to get my rent paid.Life is good!

7:22pm I never did call the billing office again. I already called them twice. The last time I talked with them was before lunch. They were supposed to send someone down. I waited all afternoon thinking I could pay my rent then But she never showed. They were supposed to send someone Friday and they never came. I will call them tomorrow and hopefully take care of the rent. I swear trying to pay what you owe them is like pulling teeth.

Other than that I had a good afternoon. I was well fed today. For lunch I had enchiladas chicken , corn and Mexican rice. Then for dinner I had ham and pinto beans, cornbread, and coleslaw. I had a spice cake for desert. The coffee was tepid today but I drank it anyways. Luke warm coffee was my only complaint.

I bought a few books this afternoon. I bought a bio of LBJ by Robert Dallek. I bought five of his books. The total came to $50.00 and some cents. I’m not buying anything else until I get my rent paid. Like I said I am hoping to pay my rent tomorrow.

I managed to calm myself down after lunch. I read a lot I finished a chapter in Vineyard of Liberty by James MacGregor Burns. The chapter I read was about the War with Mexico. We almost doubled the size of our territory but at the same time this only increased sectional differences that lead to the Civil War. I started to read the next chapter I read an interesting chapter on New England transcendental movement.

I had a good afternoon for the most part. I was well fed, and was able to lose myself in a good book. Chocolatechip had some bad news and she was upset I will talk about that tomorrow