How could I know…

that everything you said were lies about devotion and desire…

Why did you have to come into my life? I was FINE. There was nothing wrong with my life. I was ENJOYING my time alone. I was HAVING FUN being single. I was GETTING SHIT DONE. I DIDNT FUCKING NEED YOU. Then you came in, and turned my life upside down. Made me feel stupid rediculous crazy feelings that I’d never felt before. Made me happy. Made me feel like my life before you was missing something and I finally knew what it was. BUT IT WASN’T. I WAS FINE. I was enjoying my life. I was going to school and doing something with myself. FUCK.

I can’t stop crying. It’s not like a continuous stream, it’s just… I’ll think of something or see or hear something and there will be a squinchy face and a few tears. But I just can’t seem to make myself stop doing it.

My dog has slept ouside my room for the past week. I wish I could let him in and cuddle with him, but I can’t because I’d have to leave the door open in case he wanted to leave, and then the cat would get in and BAM allergy attack. It’s so strange how sometimes animals know what you’re feeling. 

I wish I could feel better.