Dec 1

An estimated two weeks until our little one arrives. I’m not sleeping much. Her little bottom pushes into my ribs. Her head weighs on my pelvis. I feel paralyzed in packing the hospital bag, so it’s empty. Yet I’ve managed to end up terribly sore and achy every night from cleaning the house

Last night, I raged and cried. I had to tell myself not to wake him up, that this feeling would pass. And it did, but at that moment it felt like nothing could stop it or that it would ever go away on it’s own. I put on a meditation. And I got mad at the meditation. Because how could the narrator be so calm and how could I not make myself that way?

Plus, work. Despite being due in two weeks, I am feeling that anxiety from expectations of everything I have to do with 5 days left. But I am doing the best I can.