Number One

Dear Universe,

I used to frequent this site, many moons ago, in the early 2000s, as a teenager. I cannot recall my username; therefore I have less to cringe at. Now I am in my 30s. I think I need to make this journal part of my journey, my therapy.

Yesterday I underwent an assessment for intensive CBT my anxiety has been pretty bad during the last few years and I have PTSD. I think the pandemic tore my mask away, deep down I’m glad it did. They agreed to place me on the waiting list. I stupidly asked how many people were on said list, 88 was the answer. They signposted me to a website to use in the meantime. I’m a little frustrated by this but all MH services are so stretched but I am thankful for living somewhere that has healthcare accessible to all.

I broke the keyboard to my laptop months ago, then this evening I powered it up and the keyboard is in full working order again, so here I am.

Managed to stay sober all week too, I’m tired of the escapism. I just want to learn how to live in the present and it be okay.

Big Hugs to my fellow OD Humans

Nell