Dormir

  On the way to school today my eldest sister told me that she’s going to go to Italy next month.  She was nervous about telling our parents though as sometimes their tendency to worry gets carried away.  We had a long talk about it, as our normal morning commute is about an hour.  My sister is 30 years old and the favored child of the three.  But not without reason.  My sister got straight A reports throughout her elementary, middle, and high school years.  She graduated valadictorian of her class and was accepted at several big name universities.  She graduated with full honors from one of them, was given a full ride to another prostigious university where she got her Ph.D.  I’m proud of my sister, yet I still feel sad for her sometimes.  Its hard to distinguish what she did for herself and what she did for our parents out of her accomplishments.  My eldest sister and I have had the best connection of any of my family members.  We had to face alot of the same experiences but we grew into two very different people.

  Anyway, tonight at dinner the moment arrived.  My sister told our parents and I helped where I could to swing arguement or support her way.  Our parents did freak out, but luckily not as bad as they could have.  Eventually they calmed down enough to accept the idea. Our father was even kind of happy for my sister to be able to travel like she is.  So things worked out.  Mom was still worried about what might happen and the like, but that’s the way she always is.  I didn’t say it, but I thought to myself that even if something happened to me going somewhere or doing something, I’d rather die happy, or at least content in what I do rather than miserable.

  It was a little ironic that right after I thought that I got one of those pains in my chest.  I get these tight pains in my chest from time to time, like something got pinched closed all of a sudden.  I don’t say anything because they’re infrequent and because I know that we really don’t have the money for me to take a bunch of tests that might not find anything.  And if I die…well, I guess I’ll have to find something each day that makes me happy or at least content.

-Damien