The Unsaid things

One thing I like about visiting with my sister Teresa is that we get to open up and look at some of the things in the Unsaid Box. It’s the stuff we never talked about growing up or the things we are afraid of or the things that challenge us. I like that it happens patiently and without judgment, we examine these things as one might items in a museum, without much personal attachment. And like the items in a museum, we see how they create a statement about the culture of the time, the way they fit (or maybe don’t fit) together, the way they define some aspect of our former and present selves. There’s a LOT of stuff in there but, like the museum pieces, we may not necessarily get to cart them all home.

I had a wonderful visit in just about every way possible. Brisk cool Autumn weather, changing leaves, snowy mountains, leisurely walks, gentle conversation, coffee with friends!!! ;o), different new foods, watching the tube, and outsmarting the cat (sometimes) but mostly spending real time with people I love. I wish that whatever cancer may have to teach my sister (and the rest of my family) that it will be over in no time and banished to memory. She bears it with a sense of equanimity and grace, it seems to me, and in doing so sets a tone for the rest of us that we needn’t wring our hands or flail about, that we only need to be mindful of this unwelcome guest.

On the way home today, at 35,000 feet, all I could see was a cottony blanket of clouds beneath me. Because I live on the ground, I know it’s there. But the appearances suggest otherwise. Much in life is like this, reality is obscured by the things that blind us and are made of almost nothing. We need merely look deeper.