been a bit

so he’s been gone over a week and a half, now. I guess he got his own phone and his own place, I think its weekly, he was talking about it on a video

with other people. He refuses to talk to me, will not text, and now with his new phone i have no idea what his number is.

Its all immature bs, that he just had to go get anger management but now its this way, and who knows.

I know i have to move on but it just hurts so much to love someone and they just ghost you completely.

A 48 year old man doing this is insanity.

On the other hand, he really didnt have his shit together at all, here and yanno what? it wont be any different when he’s out there, gets his check, realises that he cant smoke 200 in weed a week, get food, essentials and pay rent.

not with what he brings home weekly, Unless he really tried with it, but if he didnt have it here, what on earth makes me think that he will out there.

Because I hear shit about they will change for who they want to.

I mean, I’d be okay with it if he would talk to me, about whats been going on, but i see he got back in touch with Amy and now he’s been hanging with her and got her a gift and Im like, WTF.

Idk… And then of course theres tammy. We got into it, but we now have clear understanding, i believe, but i have ideas that she’s going to try to keep him away from me as long as possible. She used her damn kids as a weapon, who does that shit? But off he went, anyway.

Tammy apparently knew me as a kid, pre accident i vaguely recall her, but it is what it is. we went to elementary together before my accident.

I know i didnt return to that school, so who knows.

Anyway, i told her I wasnt jealous of her at all, but i didnt like how he tried to get us to hate each other by his jealousy. I told her i knew she was only trying to help, but also i believed she doesnt belong in our relationship, but between her kids and him, thast on them.

The way my friend put it, They make him feel young, again. He cant handle a child at 3 and she is really out of this world with energy.

But older kids, he can. So who really knows. All I know is that my door is open to him, but my boundaries remain.

I havent been on because the wifi hot spot on my phone wasnt working right, i just figured it out today.

toodles

 

 

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