The truth

I’m getting older, getting closer to that day and all,..

Well,..

Ive been realizing some things bout my self lately. I can lie on the outside, but its okay to be honest with my self.

I’ve been having dreams lately about selena,.. last nite was kind of sad and scary. I was taking to her ghost and telling her how much I missed her. But how can you miss some one you’ve never met? Another dream I had about her was soo sad.

Her husband was on stage playing the guitar, and there was an audience,.. and a small picture of selena and a stool where she would have been sitting. The feeling I got from that dream was soo empty. She was gone. I cant even being to imagine the pain and empty heart break that her family must have felt,…feel.

Im selfish. In the end it is all about me. Im more like my father than my mother.

I’ve never really had friends,.. so I dont know how to be one. I realized that the other day when I was reflecting back on how I’ve dealt with people.

Imperfection,Perfection.

Strive to survive

Live and give

take dont share

its mine go away.

smile.

myself. my own wealth.

so many things to want and complain about.

I really want to meet new people

and I will.

I need to work on myself, and I think Ive already begun the process