Just a Thought

I can’t cope I can’t cope I can’t cope I can’t cope I can’t cope I can’t cope I can’t cope I can’t cope I can’t cope…
I don’t know what to do.

What happens if, once I get to college, I can’t deal with it? I’m going to be in the same building, corridoors maybe even classes with someone that I haven’t really spoken to in months. Every time I see her in town, my stumoch flips. Maybe I’ll learn to cope, or maybe we’ll get talking and get over it, but… I don’t know.

I’ve been feeling quite low recently. I don’t know if it’s because I’m over half way through seven consecutive days of working, or if I’ve got a cold, or if… I don’t know. I feel sort of depressed. Not in a big way, but more then I have in a while. It scares me. Every time I eat at the moment, it makes me feel ill. I don’t know if it’s related. I’m more dizzy then usual. I haven’t been sleeping properly. I’m both restless and exhasted.

I have my final college interview on the 1st. I’m half convinced that they’re going to tell me they don’t want me anymore, or that I can’t do the courses I want. Or. Or. Or.

I think I need to sleep.

I wish I still smoked, I could really do with a joint.

-x-