Statutory Rape Has Never Looked So Good.

A few days ago, I was doing my part as an informed citizen by watching the fair and balanced news on Fox News when I came across something that pissed me off to no end – a story about how a female teacher accused of "molesting" one of her students is going on trial soon. Before I go on, I must make sure that none of you sons of bitches have been hiding under a rock, this is NOT the story of Mary Kay Letourneau, even though that babe also rules and should have gotten a medal for best sex-ed teacher in Seattle, and not jail time on some bullshit "child-rape" charge. Even when the kid’s mom sued the school district for neglect, the lucky bastard involved wanted nothing to do with it, cos he claims that the entire time he was not a victim (in fact, now that the kid is 23 and the chick is out of the slammer, he is already talking to her again), but that is getting a head of myself. All you need to know is that this is a famous case of a hot MILF teacher getting it on with a horny male student.

Well, apparently, the trend didn’t stop there. Very recently, another teacher chick Debra LaFave from the Plywood State Florida afflicted with "pedophila" happened upon a 14yr old boy she was a teacher for who she "victimized".

Now, before I go on, I should mention that at 14 years old, a boy is already in high school and shouldn’t really be called a boy anymore. Secondly, if this boy was anything like me when I was 14, he is as horny as all hell and probably planned on boning at least five other babes in his class that WEREN’T the teacher. But pictures speak a thousand words and THIS is the face of the sexual predator threatening horny teen males everywhere:

 These pics can be downloaded for personal use, including masturbation. 

 The reason why she looks pissed is cos she’s being unfairly persecuted. 

All I gotta say is: where the FUCK was I supposed to sign up to get "victimized?" I mean, if that teacher was a dog, I would understand, but holy shit! Fellas, I am sure you guys know where I am coming from with this. We’ve always had at least ONE teacher who you wanted to keep you in "detention" for sit for the ultimate "oral" exam, and maybe hit that from the back while slapping her ass with the ruler. Powers know I did with that fine-ass math teacher freshman year. You think if we got it on that it would be considered rape? HELLZ NO. Maybe in the eyes of old pathetic impotent bastards who can’t even get it up anymore, but to normal people who can still fuck, this is a dream come true.

According to the story, "Lafave is accused of having sex with a 14-year-old student at least five times at her home, at school and in the back of her SUV." Poor kid, but it doesn’t end there: "The student identified butterfly and Chinese letter tattoos on Lafave’s body for investigators."

Holy shit. A hot teacher chick with tattoos? The news story says that this Floridian babe is not planning on pleading insanity when she was fucking the "victim." The way I see it, I’d be insane to NOT bone this hottie.

What happened here is not a crime. This whole "child-rape" charge is ridiculous. No man on Earth except maybe an Adventist or Mormon would be able to resist a hot piece of ass like that, so why should anyone expect a kid to? I mean, what was she gunna do to the kid, get him pregnant? Would it have been better if this kid had decided to have sex with a 13 year-old girl classmate instead? If this was a male teacher on a chick (or on another boy), then it might be different. That might sound sexist, but fuck you – you KNOW I am right. Even the California Supreme Court agrees with me when they upheld in the Michael M. v. Sonoma Superior Court, 450 U.S. 464 (1981) case that statutory rape can only occur if a underaged female has sex with an adult male.

Even if she forced him into it, I don’t think it would be the worst thing that could have ever happened to him, and it is quite obvious that they were both willing partners in this. Shit, the kid is probably a god at his school now that everyone knows what went down. He lived the ultimate fantasy – seducing his hot teacher. I am sure right now that while both of his parents feign outrage, the dad is secretly thinking to himself "that’s my boy" and plans on giving him a gold star for losing it in the best possible way. Besides, I think we all know that if this kid had shot and KILLED someone in Florida, the law would be trying him as an adult. Am I wrong?

This kid is not going to grow up traumatized. If there is any crime that went down here, it is that his bitch of a mother and his asshole cousin turned her in. He could have been doing that shit for three more years if he had the sense to keep his mouth shut instead of bragging to the world how he was nailing the hot teacher. That and the fact that this babe’s husband will probably be hanging from a hotel showerhead with a telephone cord wrapped around his neck after he comes to terms with the fact that he got traded for a 14 year old kid.

-His Divine Shadow