Ruby Slippers.
I just want to dissapear. I want to snap my fingers and be in a dream… like Dorothy from The Wizard of Oz. I want my ruby slippers. I want to click my heels together and have all of my worries dissapear into a subliminal array of colors, candies and munchkins.
Why can’t we do that? Why can’t we escape reality through something like that? I have the worsts of worsts days… I wake up crying… and thats all I want.
I am seriously wondering all the time, if its ME… or if its all the daily drama I have to deal with.
Have you ever been sooo deeply in love with someone, for years and years… that doesn’t love you back? Its enough to eat away the pure thought of love in your brain. It eats your soul. Its like a nasty bug that makes all the good in your heart dissapear inch by inch.
When I saw the title of Ruby Slippers, I thought that you were going to have music from the Wizard of Oz. That and you were going to show us a picture of Abby dressed in ruby red slippers. Imagine my face when neither of those were the truely the case. 🙁 But, but, but.. that’s okay, Val. I’ll be a big boy and hush up now. Seriously. Not another complaint from me. Till I write my entry…
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.. soon. Then I’ll definitely babble on and on. Anywaaaaaaaaaays.. *hugs* I’m sorry that you are feeling this way. If it helps, I definitely feel the same way. Though I might not waking up crying, a lot of time I just have this feeling of sorrow and not wanting/feeling to do anything. I think it’s all the stress of life, your trying to make it better for yourself/Abby, work..
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… and the recent stuff with you and Abby’s dad all mixed together. I know and seen that you are naturally happy, go-lucky person when things are good or you are so self content with life the way it is. But, of course, we are people. People with feelings of just wanting all of the simple things to fall in parallel and in the right places, and honestly.. that’s all that really matters to people ..
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.. like you anyways. Hang in there, Valerie. The best is yet to come, and in time, remember, you’ll sit there when things are in place with you and smile knowing that the times you wept, the times you were sad, the times when you wanted to disappear are long over with but with the love and support from your family, friends, and God, “You did it!”.
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