Voice of Reason

As a nurse, surrounded by other caregivers, I find our hearts amusing. We must often be reminded by OT to let the patients do what they can for themselves instead of doing all the things for them because we want to make them better- emotionally, physically, even sometimes spiritually. We love to take care of others. And when we aren’t taking care of our patients, we’re trying to take care of each other. Whether it be through food, assistance, or emotional support.

I remember at the end of nursing school, the lot of us wanted to share one last meal together before we all went our separate ways. It look us two hours to decide on a place to eat because everyone had an  opinion, but no one wanted to make the decision that might upset someone else. Bunch of S’s James likes to remind me.

But there are times when love and caring are tough. Tough love doesn’t mean I don’t care that you’re in pain, or uncomfortable, or that you are still really sick. Sometimes it means that the pain is good for you and you have to learn to live with it. Sometimes it means that even though you still feel like you’re having a hard time breathing, and you have 9 more days of abx, it’s still safer for you to heal at home then in a hospital where you could catch something even worse.

tonight, it meant that despite my efforts to provide good information, a detoxing alcoholic had to walk back to their car in nice weather from where they had been found passed out the night previously. The on coming nurse looked at me in horror. “I’m sure you could have done something!”. Yes. I could have driven her myself (ssssssoooooooo not ever happening). I could have called an ambulance to take her 3 blocks down the road. The patient stated there was no one that could come give her a ride and she didn’t have any money. I gave her the number to a local lady that drives around and gives the drunks rides home for free so they get home safe and told her that I didn’t think she charged anything, but the patient refused. I somehow became the voice of reason on the floor of caregivers. And asked a simple question. When do we step back and allow the patients to be responsible for their own health and actions? This was not a child. This woman was old enough to have 4 children ranging from 10 to 24.

I am all for helping people…this lady didn’t want help. Or if she did, not the kind we at the hospital had to offer. She spent all day refusing any and all help that she asked for in the ER when they admitted her. It’s frustrating, and heartbreaking. I wanted to yell at the oncoming nurse, of course I wanted to help! But that patient needed to want to be helped, and she obviously wasn’t there yet.

I hope she made it to where she wanted to go before the rain hit.