the trip that shall not be named

yeah, pretty much, it was that bad. Walt Disney World is certainly not the happiest place.

how bad?

the worst bit is that K’s parents are now talking about divorcing each other.

yeah. Christmas day, at dinner, K’s mom was being pretty mean to K’s dad. Saying snarky things to him, telling him to shut up and stuff. and he usually doesnt do anything, but I guess he had it, because he told her if she didnt shut up, he was going to smack her across the face and make her shut up.

terrible thing to say to a woman. utterly terrible.

even if she’s being awful, it’s a terribly archaic, awful thing to say.

but her response was worse.

she told him she wants a divorce and she is leaving him in February.

right at the dinner table, I guess when the others had left the table (we didnt actually hear this conversation, thank goodness). She told him to leave the trip early.

He was shocked, to say the least, and got quite sick. He talked to K’s brother, B, on the way back to the hotel. He was blaming himself, and upset, and B had too much other information to let his dad think this was over one (very poor) statement.

B told his dad that his mom was having an affair.

B had some pretty obvious clues, his mom never came home on the week his dad was on a trip. she said she was having a ‘sleep over’ at a girlfriend’s house. uh right. I dont remember the last time I had a sleep over.

she was talking on the phone very late at night using terms of endearment, when his dad could not have been on the phone with her (as it would have been 1am his time).

and B searched his mother’s email and found hundreds of emails with a guy she knows from her union. including an email that told this guy all the lies she has been telling all of her family to hide that she was with him – oh I told them I had a conference for the weekend, I told them I went shopping with some girl friends, etc.

I was at my bridal shower the day after Christmas (yay, it was a fun bridal shower) where K’s mom acted perfectly fine and happy, when K found out what happened the night before. K’s dad was sick, had been throwing up all night, and couldnt eat. K’s dad finally told them what happened.

K texted me when I was on my way back to the hotel saying he missed me and needed me. I thought it was just because we hadnt seen each other for hours, since the night before.

He was so upset when I got there. I knocked on the door, he opened it, and pulled me inside. His mom was right behind me, carrying my gifts, and he said no to her, and shut the door in her face. then he told me what happened. he was really upset, and furious at his mom for doing this to his dad on Christmas day.

it was a rough afternoon. we were just stunned. a week and a half before our wedding, and all this drama.

of course, we had our wild ideas. we seriously considered just leaving the trip, which was going not so well anyway. but due to the big storm on the east coast, all flights were so messed up. let alone how impacted and busy flights are during the holidays. most flights werent even going out on Monday, and people were being delayed until Wednesday, the day we were going to leave already.

so we think K’s mom was planning to just make K’s dad leave, so then she could tell the family that he was being horrible to her behind his back. and everyone would believe her.

she had no idea that anybody knew she was having an affair.

she didnt anticipate that this would all blow up and everybody would know.

because K had to explain to his grandmother, his mom’s mother, why we were cancelling going to dinner with everyone Monday night. he told her about his mom having an affair. she was stunned. and horrified. and said she had wondered why her daughter was *never* home anymore, that everytime she called, K’s mom was gone.

grandma told her other daughter, S, and son in law. they were shocked. S came to talk to K and me, and said that K’s mom had stopped calling her. they used to talk daily, or every other day. they didnt anymore. and she, too, had wondered why M was never home. it made no sense for her to be gone all the time.

so yeah. K’s mom had quite a shock when K’s dad talked to her about the affair.

and then grandma told me all about confronting M about the affair. she asked M if she was having an affair, and M looked her in the face and said no, and grandma got so mad and told her off for lying to her face.

grandma swore quite a lot, actually. she was livid. she’s normally a very polite and sweet woman, but hooboy, she was furious. quite disappointed in her daughter.

and the thing is, K’s dad is the sweetest man. both grandma and aunt S said M was not treating him well, and they’d observed that a lot, and had been concerned. M would just say the meanest, angriest things to him when I visited. it was really awkward to be around.

as far as we know, M has been having the affair since at least the summer. and K’s brother, B, has been carrying this information around like a burden. he’d told us already, but he was going to explode eventually.

so things calmed down a bit, K’s parents talked, and had a deep, heart to heart talk about what was going on in the marriage. probably for the first time in many years.

aunt S talked with B, K and I, and she suspected the whole empty nest syndrome was really hard for M when K and his brother moved out of the house. whatever problems and lack of communication in the marriage that was already there probably got a whole lot more obvious when K and his brother left.

K’s dad is very catholic, and said he would never sign divorce papers. and he is hoping for the best, and for things to get better. he asked his sons to not judge their mother, and to be nice to her. (they are quite angry but realize this isnt their problem).

K, B and I went with their parents to lunch together on Monday, and his parents seemed ok, if sometimes they looked sad or were quiet.

we flew home on Wednesday, quite a lot of hassle due to flight delays.

and then soon, our wedding.

I’m up at 4am, unable to sleep since 3am, since I’ve got quite a lot to do today and I’m anxious about it. couldnt sleep. I’ve got ring bearer pillows to make, and need to decorate the flower girl basket. I’ve just got theories on how to decorate it.

much to do and so little time! and I still dont have any special things for the honeymoon! ack.

more about the horrid trip next time. because that wasnt all. that was just the worst of it.