Cuddling

I won’t be surprised if anyone reading this rolls their eyes or makes barf noises, but this is my truth and it’s a beautiful fucking thing. 😀

My most favorite, peaceful, comfortable, happy time comes at the end of the day  when chase is home.  The day is over and there’s nothing left but to wind down and watch some tv or put on a movie. We lay together curled up on the couch, his arms draped over my hips, or his hands running through my hair. I never care what we watch and half the time I don’t even notice. I’m just so at peace to be there. It’s the most peace I’ve ever felt in my whole life. I always get sleepy first, and I turn around and put my face in his chest and drift off to sleep, just breathing him in and listening to his heartbeat. He lets me stay there as long as I want, and when I wake up for a minute, he takes me and tucks me in bed. He is careful to be quiet, but sometimes he busts out laughing at some comedy on tv, not realizing I had drifted to sleep already. His laughter is comfort. His hands are comfort.  His smell is comfort. The feel of his body on mine is comfort. His very presence in the house is comfort. Tonight, he is at work, and it’s too far away. I feel sick and empty. Tonight, I feel no comfort, only this terrible ache. I need him more than is probably healthy. But for all the places I’ve been, I wouldn’t have it any other way.