Can’t Keep Up….
…With any kind of online journal, apparently.
Since I’ve last written, there has been a whirlwind of activity in my life. And as a result, the desire to keep up with writing it all down kind of dissipated. My last entry was a private entry. I’ve had enough time to get myself situated with the whole thing, and I’ve gotten all of my information in a line.
At the end of March, my grandmother was diagnosed with kidney cancer. They caught it completely by chance, and incredibly early from what I hear. She has since started her chemo and lost all of her hair. She wears a wig now, which is pretty cool. But she really hates it. I’m not going to lie, she does look different now.
She is the only grandmother I have. She is my dad’s mother. My mother’s parents both passed when my mother was 18, and well before I was even a thought in her mind. So being that she is my only grandmother, I do have some kind of attachment to her. Even though I’m pretty sure it is her mission in life to make me miserable sometimes, she is still family. And (for the most part) a sweet woman.
She is doing much better on the cancer stretch at the moment, although she is currently back in the hospital for another reason. My dad says they found a tick and I guess the start of Lyme Disease. I’m not sure if that is correct information, since she was just admitted late last night. But I’m sure we’ll be updated regularly.
My grandfather, not too long ago, spent a whole week in the hospital with internal bleeding. After a week of tests and surgeries, he was sent home with a clean bill of health. But they will be monitoring him more closely with his coumadin treatments. The ER doctor tried to convince my grandfather that, no, the coumadin didn’t cause this and it doesn’t cause bleeding whatsoever. His PCP told him not pay attention to the ER doctor and to call him if he has any resurfacing symptoms of bleeding. (Apparently: COUMADIN CAUSES BLEEDING. WHO KNEW??)
Tina and Patrick got married! Their wedding was absolutely beautiful and I felt so honored to be a part of it! (I felt like a princess! lol)
My friend Jason also got married recently! Another beautiful wedding! My older brother, Joey, was a groomsmen in the wedding. Unfortunately, Joey was a complete d-bag at the wedding to his own family, and I am kind of on the outs with him right now.
Carissa finally has her wedding dress in, and it is absolutely stunning! And she has most of her wedding all set, thanks to David’s mother. David’s mother booked a place for the wedding, hired a caterer, and a DJ. I’m still making her wedding cake – because Carissa won’t have it any other way and neither would I – and it is still going to be 80’s themed. I’m incredibly excited for her wedding!
Speaking of David and Carissa, they are living with Sam and I for the time being. It is working out for the most part. They’ve been here two months and there are some things that drive me crazy (their lack of cleaning, the piles of things that get left in the Blue Room and the living, the baby things everywhere (they have a part-time baby) their over-use of all of our paper products) but I really like having them here. Even when I’d normally be home by myself, I can always find something to do with either of them or talk about with them. As much as I enjoy it, I am looking forward to September, though: They’re getting married and finding their own place.
I’ll be kind of sad to see them go, but at the same time I know if they stay here too long our friendship will most definitely suffer. And I don’t want to lose them as friends because I’m a difficult person to live with.
In more news, my dad is going to break apart our entire family at the rate he is going. There is this whole ongoing debacle with him not having paid/filed his taxes in the past ten years. Us kids probably couldn’t care less. He dug himself that hole, and now he’s got to live in it. But now that the IRS is catching up with him (because the IRS will always catch up with you) it is putting a lot of stress on the rest of the family. And by ‘the rest of the family,’ I really just mean my mother, my two brothers, and me. Because the real ‘rest of the family’ -grandparents, aunts and uncles (all on my dad’s side of the family) – don’t have a freaking clue.
But my parents are at the point where the IRS is garnishing my mother’s paychecks by half, they’ve gone into her bank account and wiped her clean on more than one occasion, they’re in danger of losing their house.
Now, have you noticed that I haven’t mentioned my dad’s finances here? Oh. He does work. Yes. He has cash-flow. But he only has a bank account open under his company name. His actual name is nowhere on the account. And the IRS (apparently) can’t touch it. So my mother is the one who’s got to take the cuts here.
I actually wouldn’t care about their financial situation if not for one thing: Christopher still lives at home. He’s supposed to go back to school at RPI in a couple of weeks. But it is looking more and more like he might not be able to.
Back when Christopher was a kid, he opened up a bank account. You can’t open an account by yourself when you’re eight years old, so you have to have a parent or guardian open one with you as a joint account. Fast forward to a just a couple of years ago, when the IRS first started taking money out of my mother’s account. Christopher asked her if they could come in and take his money because her name was on his account, too, still. My mother told him no, because Christopher was the primary name on that account. But if he wanted, she would go down to the bank and remove her name from it completely.
Fast forward to yesterday.
Christopher’s bank account was completely drained of all but 36$. Because she never took her name off the account. And the IRS found it. He lost over 4000$ because of my parents. That was his tuition money. Gone. Furthermore, my father was supposed to give him another 3000$ to put towards his tuition for this semester. Surprise! He doesn’t have it! My dad never put the money aside for Christopher and put all of his extra money into his car club instead!
The situation has become absolutely ridiculous. Because now, it isn’t just my parents suffering for their own mistakes. Christopher is, too. And by proxy, me. Because he’s already told me that as soon as he graduates, he going to get a job and move far, far, far away from here. He’s already said that he wasn’t coming home for the holidays. And, I’m sorry, but I am going to be heartbroken that I won’t get to see my little brother anymore. He’s the only person in my immediate family that I actually like right now! He can’t leave!
Christopher is, understandably, upset with both of my parents. Even though my mother sat there and swore up and down that none of this is her fault, and my father is the only one to blame, she has equal part responsibility here. Yes, my dad was the one who fucked up. But she’s known that he hasn’t filed his taxes for at least seven of those ten years. And did nothing. Yes, it is my dad’s responsibility to file his own damn taxes. But my mother is the one who handles all o
f the other finances in the house. She pays all of the bills. She handles the mortgage. She has handled the 50,000$ worth of debt they had accumulated over the years. (She’s down to one credit card she has to pay off: 500$.) I’m sorry. If you are the one who handles all of the money that goes in and out of the house, and you knew that he hadn’t been filing his taxes, I think you should step up and do something about it.
Because at this point my parents are both on the same sinking ship. Unfortunately, they are also both sitting on opposite sides of said sinking ship and saying, "Well, its not my problem!" When the ship is sinking and you’re both on it, I’m sorry. That is a problem that both of you need to deal with.
RIDICULOUS SITUATION IS RIDICULOUS.
Right now, Christopher is on his way to Florida with a friend of our family. The Holman’s live up the street from my parents – have done since I was about twelve years old – and are currently moving to Florida. I’m going to miss them. They were good people. Chuck works in construction and has kept my parents from killing each other for the past almost twelve years. Him and my dad had a barter system going – My dad would work on Chuck’s car when it was needed and Chuck would work on my parents house when it was needed. Pretty much at cost.
Chuck and Lisa also threw amazing parties. I am so going to miss those.
We’ve been helping them pack and get organized for the past few weeks. And I taught Lisa and Madison (her daughter) how to knit. I’ll eventually have an entire legion of knitters on my side. Muahaha! Next week and they’re leaving.
They told Sam, Christopher and me that we could come down and visit any time we wanted. They’ll pick us up at the airport (twenty minutes away!) food us, booze us, and give us a car to drive while we are there. All we have to do is pay for air fare. Christopher is planning on going down there for his Spring Break. I would love to plan to be there at the same time. We’ll see.
In my immediate future: I’m getting my wisdom teeth removed a week before my birthday. All four, all at once. It is going to be an adventure! And it is going to break my bank account. But I’ve been putting this off for the past oh…. Five years? It is about time. It has to be done. They’re all impacted and have to come out.
A couple of weeks after that, Sam and I are going up to Maine to see his parents! Pretty much the entire rest of his family is coming up with us, too: His Nana, Grumpa, his Aunt Jeanne and Uncle Brian, and his cousin Sarah. Caravan! I’m looking forward to it.
Right now, it is about quarter to ten in the morning. I have work at 12-noon. I’m going to teach myself how to do double circular socks, toe-up. I can do this in about an hour and a half, I think.