Blah

 I’m feeling like its hard to put into words what I’m feeling.  I feel like I keep thinking the grass will be greener on the other side or that the grass was greener on the other side.  I feel like I miss what I didn’t really like at the time, and I think I’ll be happier when I’m doing something else or in another place, but when I get there, its not any better.  I’m never fully satisfied, yet later on, I miss what I had because I think I was satisfied.  I reconstruct my past emotions into being more meaningful than they actually were.  I live for every tense but the present.. I’m just stuck in the here and now.  I wait for the future where I think I’ll be better off, but I never truly am, and I’m scared I’m waiting my life away.  Basically, it comes down to the fact that I’m nostalgic for a past in which I was longing for the future.