Friend Circles

I’m not sure where I’m heading with this entry so I’m just gonna go with it.

I was looking at my friend Paul’s website and came across some pictures of what I’m assuming is one of the walls in the house/apt he shares with some friends. The wall is absolutely covered, top to bottom, with different sketches, paintings, random artistic moments created by the people that live there. And I thought to myself, ‘I really wish they could teach me how to abandon my concern for perfection. teach me to just be "artsy." Then I started laughing because that is obviously something that can’t be taught. That’s not where I’m going with that though. It’s the thought process that started this next one.

Every group of friends I have is different from the next. One group is devote Christians that surround themselves so deeply with their faith they aren’t always in touch with the real world. Another group is the "artsy" group. Grouped as "outcast" or "not normal" by all my other "friend circles." The do what they want, when they want and that’s all there is to it. They aren’t politically correct to anybody but themselves and they don’t really care. But they are passionate about what they are doing. Another group is the bar group. They’re there to drink and party and have fun. They all have seperate lives, but the bar people all smoke, drink and curse.

All these groups – SO different from the next. But I’m a part of all of them. Some small part of me relates to each group. I’ve always wondered my entire life why I can’t just fit into one of these groups. To be easily labeled? I don’t know. This is where I’m confused. I like the fact that I can relate to all of them and be friends with all of them and still be me. But who am I? What defines me? Am I even definable? Would it be so bad if I wasn’t?

You have people that want so badly to not be "normal" that they have made their own group of "weirdos." But to themselves – that is normal. It’s an endless cycle and in no way relates to what I was just talking about but it just came to me.

I’m tired and need to sleep. I have a day ahead of me. Not a full day, but simply a day because it will be more productive than this one was. 🙂

*Love until later*