It’s Interesting…

…how life takes major turns and the way we view it, and the decisions we make start to change. They become something different than what we thought we always wanted. You’re so sure of what you want when you graduate highschool. And then you move away and your perspective on things change. Priorities shift.

People that don’t make these changes (like moving out of state to go to school, or far enough away that you rarely go to your home town) with you don’t always understand them, and that can be really tough to realize. Everybody matures,  but not all people grow up. If you stay where you’ve always lived, part of you will never grow up in the way that some people will. You still have all the comforts you always had. Sure, your financial situation might change, as well as where you live, but you still know where you’re at. You know how to get places, and you know where people live. And you’ll never fully understand why people that leave change the way that they do.  That doesn’t mean you’re any less of a person, it just means there’s things in their life you can’t understand. Just like they’ll never understand how it was for you to stay in the same town.

I’m not the person I was when I left. And I’m okay with that. But some people back home aren’t. They just don’t get it. The old me would have tried to explain it. The  new me understands that they’d only get defensive and offended. Just because I’m not going back to school this semester doesn’t mean I’m any less of a person than I was this time last year. Just because I was the grandchild everybody expected to go straight through and get my masters, and now I’m taking a break, doesn’t make me feel like I’m a let down. I want to be financially stable. I’ve finally got a job that can get me there and I’m going for it. Be happy about that.

I hung out with some of the old gang tonight. Got to see the new dorms, and hang out back on campus. And oddly enough, I felt pretty much indifferent. I’m okay with the fact that I’m not going back. I’ll still get to hang out with all of my friends, and that’s all I really enjoyed about OC was the people.

"What she doesn’t get is it’s NOT the fact that she talked to her boyfriend about MY personal problems. It’s the fact that her boyfriend tried to throw that information back in my face in an extremely intense and rude way…when it wasn’t any of his damn business in the first place. THAT is where the line got crossed. I do tell my bf everything too, but he never crosses the line and butts in because he knows it’s not his deal. She doesn’t get that. If my feelings got hurt, she should have at least apologized, because even if he knew what he was talking about, it’s not his place to say anything like that to me."

But that’s her beef, not mine.

True friends understand change, even if it means they temporarily feel left behind.

*Love Until Later*