Memories
Difficult day today. Terry & I are super busy packing and packing, waiting for the enormous amount of rain they have predicted to fall soon.
Got into the shelves of a little used closet. Had to go thru boxes that have been there for 11 years, since we moved here. Inside I found all kinds of things related to my kids. I’m not a big keeper of stuff but some things need to be saved. I cry, missing my son and I pack. I find the high school yearbooks that my daughter has been looking for. …. notes/cards from Terry, from David, from my daughter. I laugh some then I cry some more. I wanted to run and hide but it needed to be done.
I’m nostalgic for those days when I was just “Mom.” Sometimes I think they were the happiest of all.
I called my daughter about her missing yearbooks. She instantly identifies the tone of my voice and asks what’s wrong. I lie and say, just tired from packing. She’s delighted to hear about her yearbooks. I tell her about some of the notes I found that she’s written me over the years, teasing her about how much she loved me. She immediately assures me that she still does love me a lot. I knew this. We laugh over a few more things and she offers to come help, which I decline. She will have every intention of helping but she’ll get so caught up with items from the past that it’ll keep me from getting things packed. So we decided we’ll get together one day this week when we need a break from packing, maybe have lunch.
It was so bittersweet seeing things that belonged to the kids. I miss my son so much & I’m so glad I have my daughter.
that’s the bane of going through things for me: getting bogged down in the past and dragging myself forward out of it…
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