Middle of the Week

I always promise myself that I’ll be writing on a more regular basis and then along comes life. I get busy with one thing or another and forget to write about all the thoughts I have.

Had a wonderful day with my daughter last Monday. It’s so lovely to watch her become a more together and balanced adult. Sure does a mother’s heart good.

I haven’t been going to art class for awhile. I had a problem with a new student in the class. He, apparently, has very little ability to even draw so I must assume that he wants to just enjoy learning to paint for personal reasons and I have no problem with that.

All of us longtime students prefer music while painting and if it’s upbeat, that’s better (most of us are far too elderly to like rock music). On this student’s first day, he asked if we had to continue to listening to such “inane music”. The teacher promptly changed the radio to a classical station. I enjoy classical music. Spent many years playing classical music on the piano. But to me, not all classical music is good listening/painting music. Some can get downright depressing.

So the next class I brought a couple classical CDs I have so at least we could enjoy the music. Of course, I was just waiting for him to complain the next time when we turned on the soft rock station, but alas, he didn’t. I was so prepared to handle that situation.

I also had a problem with the teacher spending so much time with this new student.
( I know- all petty stuff) But after thinking about it, I realized I had more of a problem with him, not even being aware of how much time he got from the teacher. I know me (the sometime “people-pleaser” and sometime not) and my friends would be aware of it and say something to the effect of “please don’t let me take up too much of your time because others may need you.” Not a peep out of Mr. New Student. I wonder how you get to a level of not even being aware of others’ needs.
People like him bug the heck out of me.

I’ve been painting more lately though. More at home than in class. Realized that I go for two reasons. One to get some expert help/advice on my painting and the other is to have a great time with my friends there. It became apparent that I need more help as I get closer to finishing a painting rather than when I start work on the painting. After the initial charcoal drawing, paintings are a process of layering color over color. Then, the refinement of the painting. And this is where I need help. So as long as I continue to paint at home, I find I can only attend class when I need to attend class. My long time built in guilt syndrome has no need to kick in when I figure these things out. I also don’t need to pay for fun time with my friends. I’m on a pay per class schedule which also means I don’t have to deal with Mr. New Student on a continual basis.

As always, when I write here I “suddenly” see insights that I hadn’t really acknowledged before. I guess Mr. New Student bothered me more than I thought he did but it also led to me seeing what I need from class and what I don’t. The older I get, the less conflict I need. Drama just doesn’t appeal to me anymore. I try to keep up with politics and what’s going on in the world but I no longer will listen to all the talk show hosts give their opinion. My blood pressure is just fine now and I aim to keep it that way.
Tomorrow, I will attend art class because I’ve reached that point on the canvas I’m working on where I need help/direction. Sometimes it’s hard to know when the painting is finished. One thing I have learned is that you can totally ruin a painting by continuing to paint when it’s finished. Stopping and stepping back makes all the difference. That has probably helped me deal with Mr. New Student also.