It’s over for now, not for good.

June 3, 2020 – 11:33 P.M.

It’s incredibly frustrating and on the embarrassing side I’m struggling to not talk to you at all. I wish I knew why it was so hard. I think it’s worse that you’re just accepting the fact I haven’t talked to you in a couple days.

We both said time will help. We both said we still want to talk and be friends. But your track record in being honest isn’t the greatest and I really don’t know what to think. I’m hoping your actions will prove what you truly feel. But it’s not looking good and this stupid heartache just continues. The longing grows. I’m not thinking about you as much but fucking a. When I get the urge to talk to you, it’s hard to stop myself. I miss you.

I miss my friend. My bestie. The conversations we had. Especially the ones that made me laugh out loud. I miss staying up late together. I miss things being normal and not strained or weird between us. We’ve both said how we love what we have. But bestie, we have lost it. I feel like I’ve lost you.

I hate it.

I really fucking miss you. I wish you missed me too.

If I knew you pushed away so savagely, then I’d back off. So take it easy on me.