One week…

Well my mood has stabilized mostly. Of course I know that can change at anytime but I’m being careful and trying to control it. The weekend was good. I got to relax and also hang out with K when he wasn’t working. Things seem to have calmed down between us so I feel better about that. Regardless of how I might feel for him or any additional feelings he may or may not have for me, I am genuinely happy to have him in my life as a friend. I don’t want to lose that. I’m doing my best to put whatever other feelings I have for him on the back burner for now and just go with the flow and enjoy spending time with him. I know that he never ditches me or avoids me and he usually always includes me in things if/when he can. That’s what matters!

So I have this week to get through and then on Sunday I am driving the 4.5 hours home to see my parents for like 5 days or so. And another surprise I got today is that I will get to see my brother too! I haven’t seen any of them for about a year. Being able to see my brother is a huge bonus. He is my only sibling I honestly care to see. I am looking forward to not only having a full week away from work, but I am able to get out and away from this house and my roommate. He is driving me crazy.

I’ve lived here for almost 2 years. At first there was 4 of us: me, D1, D2, and A. D1 and D2 are brother and A is the fiance of D2. Anyways..the lovebirds are like 22-25 years old. The oldest, the one I still currently live with is 33. He owns the house we live in. However, he does NOT know how to take care of himself or do anything that requires adult responsibilities. His brother used to do everything from the lawn care to paying the bills. Now that he is gone, the yard hasn’t gotten mowed and you get a fine if it doesn’t. He finally decided to try to mow it but the lawn mower broke down because it hasn’t been used in I don’t know how long. So now he has set up something with a company to have them come and do it for him. He won’t do the dishes. He puts them in the sink and we originally had a deal where I’d fill the dishwasher and run it, and he would empty it so I could refill it. Yeah…in the past 3 months he has done that TWICE. The dishes just chill in the sink until I get sick of looking at them. I have tried asking him multiples time to do it. I even had him wash the bowls one time because they are the tupperware bowls and don’t fit into the washer very easily. He bitched about it the entire time saying he had to wash dishes at work that day too.

He has never bothered to clean the litter boxes for the 3 cats although that isn’t a huge deal because since 2 of the cats are mine, I took control of that. He doesn’t help fill the food or water bowl. They will go all day without water until I go into the kitchen and see that it’s low. Yesterday I filled it and he was like “I put a cup of water in there earlier”. I was like no…you didn’t…because if he had then it wouldn’t have been almost empty. Neither of us really ever cook and he will once in a while but he always throws a fit if I get myself food and not him. I’m home by myself all day every day of the week so I just take care of myself. He is a grown man. He isn’t my boyfriend or husband. He is my roommate. He can take care of himself. But he doesn’t know how. Oddly enough the only thing he does on his own is his laundry. I can’t even get him to go shopping with me. When this whole COVID thing started and I wanted to go to the store, I asked him to go with me on Sunday. It was his day off. He was like but that is my day to game with D2. I was like well it’ll only take like an hour, you can go shopping with me. He said an hour was too long.

Now, I like playing games as well. I would love nothing more than to stay home all day every day and just play games or watch tv. But…I am an adult. I have responsibilities that I must take care of. Those come first. The sooner I get those done, the sooner I can do whatever the hell I want. But no, not him. Gaming with his brother is the #1 priority. Heaven forbid he miss 30 minutes to an hour of that precious time. Now, a part of me really wants to move out of here. I didn’t sign up for taking care of a 33 year old man baby. At the same time…rent is decent. I get to have my two cats with no issues. Living in a house is 10 times better than an apartment. But…I don’t think it’s worth what I go through dealing with him. Things aren’t cheap around here though so I need to save up, which I’m currently trying to do, and hope I can find something that is affordable for me.

I think I’ve done enough complaining today. 😂 one more hour left of work and then I get to go chill in my room. Success!