I miss you more.

Sis,

You called me at 8:45pm, we talked for 9 minutes, 4 minutes past your time limit. My tears are so heavy I cant even see the letters on the keyboard. I am grateful it is me that you choose to talk to when you feel mad, sad, alone, and happy. Sometimes I don’t have the right words for you and it makes me feel responsible for your feelings. I never want you to hurt because it seems as though that’s all your life has been in your short 18 yrs. You said you wanted to come home, but you won’t because there’s nothing here for you. As much as I want you to come back, I wont be selfish, I am staying strong for you, so you can be strong for yourself. I am saddened everyday when I think about you, yet happy at the same time. You are growing up but you will always be my little sister, and I will always do my best to protect you, our littler brother and sister. Grandma said you are always with her, and N & D said they miss you and love you. Of course mom and dad didn’t respond, but you don’t need to know that. Anyway, I cannot wait to have you back in my life, just like before, but take your time. I can wait. I’m always praying for you and thinking about you. Whenever you start to miss me just remember… I miss you more.

-H