Another Day….Lost 1.5lbs in one day…YAY

So this morning I was 1.5lbs lighter than I was yesterday. That was great. I was supposed to quit smoking today but I kept telling myself I will just have this last one. Well I did finally just have the last one in my pack like 10mins ago so we’ll see if I can make it. The hard part is trying not to binge while I am quit. I don’t want to binge. I feel a stronge urge to binge though right now and am worried that by the end of the night I will cave. I usally stay up later until around 12:30am and usually end up binging at 11pm for some reason. It feels safer to binge then cuz then I can just go to sleep and tell myself I will start over tomorrow. I kinda binged this afternoon after my small lunch, however my caloric intake for the day is still under 2000 so that’s good. I know that’s still a lot to eat but not hugely over my limit since i am still breastfeeding. I still have the night to get through however and without smoking it will be harder I think.

I am going to try to keep myself busy doing whatever takes my mind off of eating and smoking and see how long I can manage both my cravings. I hope the night. We will see…Anyways, not much else is new today. The carnival is in town here again for the 3rd time this year so tomorrow I might take my kids up there to look and see how long it will be in town. I gotta just keep myself busy. Cleaning for me seems to be the most mind calming thing I can do. After I binge I like to clean because I am moving and burning some calories and also I feel like I am cleaning the chaos inside me while I am cleaning the house at the same time. Anyways, going to go now as there’s not much new going on. I just want to update on here regularly so I am trying to get into the habit again. Seems to help a bit, to have all of you reading and leaving me notes. That way I don’t feel so alone…..Hope you all are well…

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when I really want to binge it helps me to go outside or into a room that I don’t normally eat in (like my bedroom) and draw big letters that spell out why I can’t eat. Then I color all the letters and by the time I manage to finish that, the craving has usually passed.

August 26, 2009

you aren’t alone, dont ever think that……i know how it feels though. *hugs*

August 29, 2009

I know it’s hard to quit smoking. Good luck. 🙂