My Last Weekend…

This is my last weekend to be bad and not look at what I am putting into my body. Monday marks the start of at least eating better and cutting down portions. I’m not going to go into a crazy fad diet, but I am going to monitor what I am eating and try to drink more water. I have to make this change for me, no one else, just me.

I have a notebook ready to start tracking my scale victories, I have a pair of pants and a dress to track my non scale victories. I might make a page here to keep myself accountable… Forgive myself when I make mistakes and keep going. You can’t stay down when you fall down. My goal is to create small habits that easily mold into bigger and better ones.

I can’t do to much activity wise right now as I have injured my knee (which is getting better but slowly). So I will have to limit it to sitting exercises and some small bouts of walking. I was debating a floor cycle so that I could “bike” inside while I was healing and getting my strength up in my knee. When the gyms open back up I am going to try to make it a point to water walk/swim once a week to start and move up to twice a week a couple weeks after.

I can’t let this be another failure at trying to lose weight and be healthy. My joints need it, my mind needs it, I need it! I’m going to fall off the wagon, I will probably think to quit at some point. But I can’t this time. This has to be the last time I start this journey and the only option for moving forward.

Log in to write a note
May 9, 2020

I’m so drawn to this topic and I don’t really know why?  Maybe it’s because of all the stuff I’ve gone through that required total self-awareness and making changes.  The one big thing I learned is making a decision vs making choices.   I often take advantage of any seeming opportunity to share knowledge / spread awareness of this quite very effective key.

I recently gained at least 20 pounds.  I know exactly how it’s happening: I’m eating the wrong foods, at the wrong time and not eating enough of the right foods consistently.  I’ve gone through this many times.  I once got myself up to 180 pounds, size 13.  I had no idea, honestly.  I just happened to notice it one day.

I finished my online grocery shopping order today.  I bought stuff for the freezer, stuff for the pantry and things I *need to eat right away (fresh vegetables).  I have to make the decision that all the regular things I lazily do – or lazy things I regularly do – have had their time and place in my world but now I’m going to put it away from me.  The real goal here is to just do what I say I’m going to do.  That’s it.  I don’t need to focus on anything else.  Usually when I get fresh food, instead of processed stuff that’s quick and easy to prepare, it sits until it goes bad.  I keep choosing the easy, lazy stuff over the stuff that takes work and effort.  I know where I’m going wrong.  I know what it takes to do better.  Once I make the decision (which I definitely haven’t done but am starting to, now) most pieces automatically fall into place and some of the work actually does itself.