06/23/2012

i read through the lame tom entries and texted him, "just saw something that reminded me of you. you won’t respond and i’m still crazy, but i have a terrible habit of letting people know when i’m thinking of them."

which i do.

he actually responded with, "i still think about you." to which i chuckled and sent a "haha" and he said, "seriously. i do!"

i then wished him well and he asked if i was still living in town and i said i was and asked if he was, too. he never responded.

my stomach jumped a little when he responded and i honestly waited by my phone and checked several times hoping he’d respond…

…but i should know better.

and i have a boyfriend. i’m treading in murky waters.

there’s no reason to be contacting him, but there were so many things i forgot about. so many things he’d told me. so many things that will always be unfinished.

and what would i even say if i saw him? why would i want to see him? to start the whole cycle over? to tell him i have a boyfriend to prove that even if he didn’t want me, someone did? someone still does?

lots of people do?

am i twelve?

there’s only one thing to do to solve this problem — retail therapy.