How’s That Asphalt Taste? Nom nom nom!

This past weekend I was enrolled in a motorcycle training course through Motorcycle Ohio at the Honda plant in Troy. Bobby took the course a few years ago and highly recommended it to me. He was even sweet enough to take the class with me despite not needing his motorcycle endorsement. The class was all day Saturday and Sunday and culminates in an exam, the passing of which will award a motorcycle endorsement.

So we packed our lunches and drove up to Troy bright and early Saturday morning. The first few hours were in a classroom on site where we learned the very basics of motorcycle riding and watched some videos. Then we headed out to the course which was a large parking lot sectioned off specifically for the class. Luckily motorcycle ownership is not a prerequisite, so I was assigned my own little motorcycle, a Honda Rebel. It was very pretty and small and light enough for me to hold up. We learned the basics of shifting, which was hard for me to grasp at first due to not knowing how to drive a stick shift.

I was having so much fun at first! There were two instructors and twelve students. One would describe the practice exercise and the other would demonstrate it one of our motorcycles. I learned how to balance, shift, brake, turn, weave, etc. After about an hour of being outside on the bikes we stopped for lunch, at which point I decided that I was too hot and took off my leather jacket and left it in our car, which was on the other side of the facility and not easily accessible. In the middle of one of our exercises after lunch the skies opened up and we got drenched. Despite being cold and miserable, I was enjoying learning how to ride. I could easily imagine myself riding down the highway on my cute little blue Honda Rebel with my hair flowing in the breeze (from under my helmet of course!).

The last exercise of the first day required some more in-class time, so we went back into the classroom. My clothes were thoroughly soaked and I was very much ready to get back to Bobby’s place and get into pajamas, but we had to practice emergency stops. After watching some of the video and doing some in-class work on quick stopping we went back outside where it had finally stopped raining. Instructor Cecil described the exercise: we were to start one at a time and get up to 15mph in second gear, then downshift to first and come to a stop within 10 feet without locking up either brake. Instructor Bill got onto a bike and demonstrated. Despite his DECADES of experience, he locked up one of his brakes and the bike skidded a bit. He then circled around to try on the other side of the course. This time he locked up both brakes and fell off the bike. Terrified, I looked to Cecil and said "I don’t want to do this!" Now, what should have happened is that they should have realized that A.) a few of us had never ridden a motorcycle before that day and B.) a smart motorcyclist wouldn’t be riding in wet conditions in the first place and decided to do this exercise the next day when it would be dry outside.

No…

Being terrified to falling, I did the first half of the course slowly, never going much over 7mph and not even shifting into second gear. Cecil was the instructor on the first side and I didn’t even come to a complete stop and he said "Good!" so I drove over to the other side. My plan was to gradually work my way up to 15mph and second gear since the exercise was to last for 30 minutes and I could easily make 15-20 passes in that time. I got up to about 10-12mph but stayed in first gear and approached the stopping section…

…and went airborne!

I’m not exactly sure what happened. All I know is that I flew off to the right and my bike skidded off to the left. I hit the ground on my right side and lay there momentarily in shock that I had been thrown off the bike. Bill came over and immediately chastised me for not shifting into second gear (which, by the way, would NOT have prevented the accident). I got up and Bill lifted my bike for me. He directed me to go over to the side of the course out of the way. Shaken, I walked over to where Bill had parked my bike and he asked if I was okay. I tried to peel my soaking wet gloves and long-sleeved T-shirt back to survey two of my three immediately most painful injuries (left palm and right elbow) and saw that there was no blood. Bobby was about 2-3 motorcycles behind me in line and once he executed his stop correctly, he came over to me. I decided then and there that I was done and would not continue the class. Bill said that it’s just not for everyone, but that I should try to get back on the course. I declined and Bobby said we could leave if I wanted to. Meanwhile, three other people dropped their bikes during that exercise and they lengthened the stopping zone. I believe I was the only one who was thrown off the bike.

So I hobbled off the course in tears, defeated. As it were, my right knee was swollen, a little skinned, and bruised. That night we went out with Christopher and Heather and a Jaeger Bomb and a Bud Wheat took care of the immediate pain, but the next morning I felt like, well…like I had an intimate encounter with the asphalt. My right side and right knee hurt and I felt pain and soreness in pretty much every other muscle and joint in my body. I’ve gradually healed over the past few days and now just have a little residual soreness and some pain in my knee, but I consider myself lucky. If I had gotten my endorsement that accident may have happened at a much higher rate of speed. Imagine if I needed to stop quickly on my way to work on 35 doing 60mph! I see this as a sign from God that I’m just not cut out to be a motorcyle rider. While I’m a bit envious of the motorcycle riders I’ve seen this week, I’m quite content on the back of Bobby’s back. Bobby suggested that maybe one day I can try again, or even get an old used Rebel (they sell for about $2500 brand new) to putz around in a parking lot just so I can have some fun. For now, I’m going to remain a passenger.