Gone again

Today at work, I talked to the lady from corprate.  The other day she’d asked me if I felt like I was in charge back there, and at the time, I didn’t really have a good answer for her. I think I said, "I guess so" Lots of confidence there!  So today, I told her after thinking about it, I feel like the store managers don’t really want me to be in charge, and that they only gave me the job because they had no other options.  She said that she had actually talked to them the other day about how they need to give me the information and training in order to do better, and that a lot of it was really just bad management on their part. (Big surprise huh?)  Then she told me that they had told her things like I was late with my paper work.  Wow, first time I’ve heard about it.  I know I haven’t always been punctual with it, but no one has ever, EVER come to me and said, you need to have this done within x amount of days.  If it had been brought to my attention that it was a problem, I would have fixed it.  But it’s like they just store up things like that, not so they can tell me or teach me anything, but just to use against me if I want more money or something.

I told her that too, that they’d never said anything to me about it, and there were other things that they didn’t tell me about until later, and I had no idea I was doing anything wrong.  I also told her that I honestly feel like it doesn’t matter how much I do, or how hard I work, they aren’t going to make me the manager, and they certainly aren’t going to pay me what I’m worth.  There was something else, oh, she said they told her I was inconsistant with my training.  Wow, how much of that do they ever really hear anyway, and when I’m trying to train people when I have a limited staff and a million other things I’m supposed to be doing, you want me to be regimented and train everyone the same way every time?  (Actually, I thought I did that pretty well, guess I was wrong.)  Again, no one ever said anything to me.  That part pisses me off more than anything.

Anyway, corprate lady said that she did talk to them about training me better and giving me what I need to do my job better.  The last thing I told her was that if they’re just going to keep doing this to me, I might as well look for another job.  I didn’t say it in a threatening way, really, it was more of a defeated, I can’t work like this kind of way.  Which is so true.  I guess the sad fact is, I’ve all ready made up my mind.  I know they’re never going to pay me properly.  The only way that would happen is if corprate lady realizes that I’m serious, and she knows what I’ve done, and what I’ve had to deal with, and if she’s able to go over them and put in a raise for me, that would be the only way it would happen.  Oh, which reminds me, I’d bet you anything the new lady they hired to do the ordering on the floor is getting paid more than me.  I’m sure of it.  And I am just fed up with the whole mess!  Now they’re really going to regret it too, because I’m going to spend the next couple of months being all sweet and perfect and doing the very best job I can, and maybe they’ll even be on the verge of giving me like .10 more an hour!  Then I’ll give my notice.  That will be all most as good as quitting on the spot.  Maybe even better!

After work, mom told me that she found out we have to give 30 days notice to cancel our kickboxing membership, they’re not going to refund this month.  So we decided to go to class.  I actually really didn’t want to go, and I realize that I’ve felt that way quite a few times.  I do love kicboxing, it’s just the instructors who don’t have the right attitude.  A prime example of this would be that not too long after we started, I decided I was going to go to the 6am class, mom wasn’t an early exercise person then, so I went by myself.  So here I am, night owl, only been going to class two weeks, fat girl, and I’m all proud of myself for getting up so early to come to the 6am class!  (Which by the way, they had mentioned in our 6pm class how no one ever comes to the 6am class, and they’re trying to encourage us to go to this 6am class.) Right! Yeah me! I’m here!  And the instructor lady says to me, well, you’re the only one, we don’t have to do class if you don’t want to.  Huh? Are you serious? 

I went to morning classes for maybe 3 weeks, hearing that EVERY TIME.  Not, "Oh! It’s so great you’re here!  Good for you!  Let’s get started!!" It really ticked me off.  I felt like I was just a burden, they didn’t really want me to come to the 6am class, they tried to talk me out of it when I was there, and she’d never go the whole 45 minutes the class was supposed to be.  It made me so mad, and actually, it makes me madder now, since thinking about it, if I’d gotten more encouragement, I would have kept going to the 6am classes, and I wouldn’t have started hating them right off the bat.  And my lovely kickboxing wouldn’t be tainted!  Curses! 

Anyway, we went to kickboxing, since we’re forced to pay for the month, and we might as well get something out of this month since the last couple of months we haven’t gone a whole lot!  Though we’re talking about seeing if the other gym we go to offers kickboxing classes.  I was thinking that I’d seen something about them.  That would be nice!  Either that, or like I said, mom and I will just have to do our own class!

Oh, there was a moment in between work crap, where I found out that I’ve been doing a horrible job all along, and having to go to kickboxing, and realizing that it’s got this miserable feeling associated with it, and it all reducded me  to tears again.  ~sigh~  Yah, definately time to get myself out of that job! 

On to other things!  I have a good story for ya.  The other day this guy wrote me on MySpace.  (On account of the rather "interesting" photo I posted of myself.)  He used full sentances and had a sense of humor, so I wrote him back.  Then, I was looking at the pictures he has posted on his space, and I thought he looked a little familiar, and there was a picture of a combine (I drove combine for a while about 3 years ago.)  and a few hours later, I was in the shower, thinking, Luke is a nice name, and I like bald heads, and, hey, wait just a minute… He was the supervisor of the combine crew I was on!  ~L~ *its a small world after all*  I wrote him again tonight and told him.  And I reminded him that he wrote me first, so I’m not a stalker!  ~L~ So hum, maybe?  (Of course, my maybes have been falling through all over the place lately!)  If nothing else, he does seem like he’d be nice to talk to, and if he doesn’t work out, I may have to find myself some other guy to talk to, since I’m tired of my in-box being empty all the time!