CasiMaybe

 Perhaps this is an appropriate time to discuss the person who introduced me to this site.  Her name is Casi.  Maybe.

We met on an online dating site.  We were both very much opposed to the concept, but decided to try it bc well, what have we got to lose?(Well I know now)

I looked at her profile and made a cute comment.  She mentioned in her musical tastes that she doesn’t like country music where the guy loses his wife, then his dog.  I asked her what about songs where the dog left first?  She loved that sarcasm.  So she decided to talk to me.  We talked for a couple hours one night, I got one hour of sleep as a result, and everything so far so good.  (Oh this is mid-July btw)

A few days later, she messages me again.  This time we talk for 8 hours, til almost morning.  Find out we have a lot in common.  For two shy people, 8 hours is an accomplishment.  I go to bed tired, but very happy.

The next day, I’m with my friends, she messages me again.  I start multitasking (I do warn her she doesn’t have my full attention) and end up messaging each other for over 12 hours.  We agree to meet at the end of that week (a Saturday) and go on a date.

By Wednesday she’s calling me on the phone.  Not hers, mind you, but a neighbor’s.  You see, this girl literally fled from Nashville.  Fled an oppressively religious family and a fiance who treats her like a neglected pet.  She’s "promised to God" to marry this guy.  He cheats on her. He gets a slap on the wrist by the church bc I guess some commandments are a "when it’s convenient" kind of thing in this sect.  She hears a voice in her head to run, and she pretty much literally did, with her dad’s (and only her dad’s) blessing.  She ends up in McKinney, about an hour from where I am.  Her mom (who’s trying to force her back) is putting a kibosh on the phone.  A neighbor lends her hers.  

She wishes to be a speech pathologist.  Go to UT Dallas (where I went).  Offer to show her around campus and the town.

Our date was supposed to be Saturday (7/27).

Friday night, she calls me letting me know she has to go back to Nashville bc her dad had a heart attack.  She assures me she won’t let family hurt her or force her against her will in any way.

Then things got weird.

Saturday, she’s looking out her window at her house and notices her stuff from McKinney on a truck.  Says her brother drove 10 hours to gather her things and take them back to Nashville (probably illegal in and of itself)  Ask her to take a picture for possible legal purposes. (never got one).  Then notices a large party type thing going on outside.  Says she has to go for awhile.  Got a message a couple hours later saying her family just tried to forcibly marry her to the jerk fiance.  Says I inspired her to disown her family and her faith in front of a hundred plus people (well the faith part she already disowned, just not to her family’s ears) and wreck her own surprise wedding.  

Then things got really weird.

Back before she left, she complained of stomach pains and said she ate some bad food.  I told her to rest, and take some tylenol bc she has a bad fever as well.

Sunday (7/28) she messages me saying she is about to undergo surgery for appendicitis and some other infection I can’t remember the name of.  

Monday (7/29) she tells me she’s improving.  Her appendix burst and infected other organs in tandem with the other condition, but says she looks to be recovering.  Is annoyed with the hospital and can’t wait to get out, though it will be a couple weeks.  I send her a video of me saying good night.  Since we’ve never met, this is the first time she sees me, well, alive, in motion.

It is also the last thing I ever spoke to her.

Tuesday (7/30) Her sister informs me via Facebook Casi’s blood becomes infected (sepsis, I think it’s called).  More surgery, not sure what will happen.  I send her a painting, and her sister agrees to show it to Casi when she regains consciousness.  She later messages me that Casi regained consciousness for 8 minutes, sees the painting, and and signs "love, Duck" (she referred to me as Ducky).

This is the painting.

Wednesday, she tells me Casi is pretty much on her deathbed.  Organ after organ fails.  Nothing they can do other than pray.

I don’t pray often.  I text her I will.

At this point, my friend decides to investigate.  He always found the whole thing fishy.  He asks for any information I can give her.  I have her address, the neighbor’s phone number, her place of employment, her full name, her Nashville address.  He says he’s gonna call these places asking for her.  Gets back to me.  Says her McKinney apt and work have NEVER heard of her.  Her family doesn’t live at the Nashville address she gives me.  At least not in 2011.  He used to look for delinquent child support scum in his previous job.  Says her last name (Andeleon) comes up with nothing.  I confirm this as well.  Casi says she has a LARGE family.  No way they completely live underground.  I casually text her sister why her work and apt have never heard of her.  She Facebook blocks me.  And that’s the last I hear from them.  

It can never be 100% confirmed, but it sounds like I got catfished.  Google it, THIS is pretty much the definition of it.  Regardless, she’s either fake or dead, and neither of them are going to make me feel any good.

I was embarrassed at being duped, but perhaps moreso at allowing my heart to open and get sucked in in a span of about two weeks.  I had my own set of red flags, but Casi never asked for money or anything of the sort.  I now have two sets of red flags, at least.  I thought now I would be happy, help someone who seemed to be a really cool girl, but nope.  Taken away from me.  I’ve been more or less depressed since.  The easiest way to upset me is to promise something then not deliver.  She promised me her heart.  Then she did something that I should have taken as red flag one.  For a person grown up superconservative Christian, she promised me her body.  Note to women: DON’T tease guys sexually.  Especially ones who didn’t even ask or imply those things.  One step at a time please.  I’m not looking to jump into bed here, I don’t know why she all of a sudden wanted to.  Just makes the end result that much more worse.

I gave her my heart.

I was too naive to realize how dumb and desperate that was.  But that was how well I thought we would fit.  The connection I felt.

Now, any girl I would feel I might have any interest in, I would like to meet.  BEFORE it goes too far.  So far, no such luck : /