Moving Away

Once again I can’t sleep. Wake up feeling depressed.  I listen music when I feel this way so there will be a few songs references. I see “Death Around the Corner (2Pac)” What should I do?

The ex ‘J ‘called me to come over and “talk” with her.  So we talked on her couch, on her floor, in her bed. After the talk we had a discussion. She told me that she’s putting her house up for sale and moving out to San Diego with her cousin. She knows I wanna move out west and asked me did I want to come also. I would love to move out to Cali. BUT at what cost? (If I moved to Cali, she is not the person I would like to be seeing). I can’t be her “Superman (Eminem)” Is this my chance to make the big change in my life? Can I get off the ledge and quit being a “Loser (3 Doors Down)”. Knowing she is my “Kryptonite (3 Doors Down)”. This may not be a wise move. I will get out there and be loss and something be in the way “The Diary of Jane (Breaking Benjamin).Could I even be happy. Even though I like her looks all tatted up. “Tattoo (The Alliance)”.  I won’t change and want to be with just her. It’s “The Way I Am (Eminem)”. I guess we’ll see how it goes this wouldn’t happen till the summer when her kids are out of school. 

 Lately ‘A’ has been extra nice, paying me more attention. Is that because I have been ignoring her or because she has not been drinking either (Cause of the DUI we both decided to stop drinking)? I know really know why but at this point I don’t know if I care.

Life is a Bitch, then you marry one, then you DIE.