Relationship OVER!
He finally came back, we got into our 30th huge fight of the year. He said he was done. I cried, and pathetically ended up asking him for a second chance. How the hell did that happen? He’s going out of town this weekend to see his dying step-grandmother. (can you have step-grandparents?) anyway…he told me several times he doesn’t think we have anymore chemistry and that our relationship isn’t worth fighting for if we have to literally fight or bicker all the time. Those words hurt deeper than all the name calling that took place between the two of us.
I was so excited finding his one year anniversary gift, and little did I know that his feelings for me weren’t even that deep anymore. Boy, do I feel like a class-A idiot. How do guys do it? How do they take a situation that is 92% their fault and end up talking their way into blaming you for 100%? AND make you feel like YOU’RE the one who should be sorry and asking for THEIR fucking forgiveness? I’m such a pathetic mess right now.
Mascara’s everywhere along with a mountain of tissues, and no one to talk to at 3 in the morning but my freaking computer. Life really does suck right now, and it’s taking every bit of strength I have right now to not jump off the bridge downtown. (not really…but the visuals aren’t looking too bad) 
What really irks me (yes, I said irk) about this whole damn thing is the fact that I wasted 8 months of my life feeling like shit for this guy. I waited 8 months to be neglected by him while he spent every living breathing moment trying to finish up his last semester in college and graduate. All the while promising me that if he stayed here in Austin for his job that September would be the best because it would mean that he finally found a job, could stay here with me, wouldn’t be stressed over school, and blah blah blah happily ever after. Well……………….I guess that can’t really happen when January thru August were spent on school and not our relationship and now we’re surprised when everything is hollow as fuck.
Why the hell did I stay with this jackass. Why the hell after I gave him the best of me for 8 months does he get to decide that, "You know what, I’m suddenly not feeling the "chemistry" between us". Fucking shit. shit. shit. shit. SHIT!!!!!!!
I seriously am going to fall into an emotional oblivion. I can’t have anymore serious relationships. It’s giving me crows feet and ugly lines on my forehead.
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i just got dumped after a few years in a relationship… i know how ur feeling. hope it gets better soon !
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Just saw you on the front page. I don’t know if you are looking for a bit of advice or just a comforting comment, so I have both for you. Advice: This pain fades with time. Definitely find someone to talk to because the emotions you’re feeling need to be expressed, even if just to a friend with a shoulder to cry on. It really is true what they say, “if it doesn’t kill you, it onlymakes you stronger”. I think every woman needs to waste time on a loser in her lifetime, it makes you that much more aware of what it is you want and need in a partner. Life is always about learning, especially learning about yourself. These lessons that we don’t learn we are doomed to repeat until we do, so take a good look at what this relationship has taught you, learn from it and move on, taking care not to repeat the same mistakes in the future. Comfort: If kind words from a complete stranger don’t tell you how much you are worthy of better, worthy of more, then I don’t know what will. There is no need to guard your heart against this in the future, if you learn from the experience you will NOT be repeating the same mistakes, choosing the wrong man in the future. B
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“How do they take a situation that is 92% their fault and end up talking their way into blaming you for 100%?” They’re all demons and will give you the Hunta virus!
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