Good golly miss molly
It’s been crazy.
We are short about 6 people at work now which means I’ve been working my tail off. I had a mental break down last week at work… just couldn’t take the stress anymore and just started crying. My boss told me that I wasn’t giving myself enough credit, that I have been doing alot better than I think I have been doing. See, the deal is, I don’t have that much training in the Labor and Delivery department and that is where I have been getting stuck. My brain does not function the way it needs to back there. I can’t handle 50 million things coming at me all at once and people yelling at you, blah blah. It’s too much too fast. And I totally lost it. I called my mom in tears saying that I hated who I have become because of the stress in my life. I know, it’s horrible that I let the stress take over. I haven’t exactly been the nicest person to be around the last couple weeks, and if you have felt the effects of that, I apologize now. Hopefully something changes soon, ’cause I’m not sure how much I can take of it anymore.
My other job is going well. I have been getting all my transcription done so, I’m happy about that. I have the day off of both jobs tomorrow, so thank God. I’m getting my hair cut in the morning. Well, I guess just a trim and getting it thinned since I am trying to grow it out a bit. Hoping if I grow it out enough the curls will tame down a bit- I’m thinking it’s only going to be wishful thinking, but whatever. I don’t care.
Hockey starts in 17 days (at least our local team does). My friend Jeff and I are planning on going to that. It’s fixin’ to be AWESOME. Our new schedule at work came out yesterday and I was looking at them today and marking the days in my calendar and I can go to 5 of the 7 games they have in the month of October. So, I was giddy about that. I’ll probably be going to most of the games alone, but hey, it’s Hockey, so I’m happy. I don’t mind going by myself actually (as strange as that may sound). Don’t knock it til you’ve tried it. It’s really not so bad. People aren’t there to watch you, they are there to watch the game. Same with movies. I actually sometimes prefer to go to the movie by myself. Guess there’s some things you just get used to no matter what.
So, everyone keeps trying to set me up with people they know. Ya know, as nice as it is, or should be, it kind of irritates me. I don’t know why, but it does. Maybe because the people they are trying to set me up with are definitely not my taste. I don’t know. There’s a part of me that’s glad there isn’t anybody in my life at this time… only because I have some stuff I need to figure out in my own life before throwing someone else into the mess. Ya know? I don’t know how long it will take to get things figured out again.
I miss Poulas. He feels like a stranger though to me anymore. And I don’t know how to stop it.
Dude, I was watching the tv show Bones the other day and there’s an episode on it that plays an AWESOME song. So, I wrote down some of the lyrics and goggled it and ended up buying the CD. It’s called “Rain” by Patty Griffin. Totally digging her voice. And the song is soooo pretty… 🙂 Love, love, love it!! Blah, I’ll just type out the lyrics.. it’s a super song:
It’s hard to listen to a hard hard heart beating close to mine
Pounding up against the stone and steel walls that I won’t climb
Sometimes the hurt is so deep, deep, deep
You think that you’re going to drown
Sometimes all I can do is weep, weep, weep
With all this rain falling down
Strange how hard it rains now
Rows and rows of big dark clouds
But I’m holding on underneath this shroud
Rain
It’s hard to know when to give up the fight
Some things you want but they’ll just never be right
It’s never rained like it has tonight before
Now I don’t want to beg you baby
For something maybe you could never give
I’m not looking for the rest of your life
I just want another chance to live
Strange how hard it rains now
Rows and rows of big dark clouds
But I’m holding on underneath this shroud
Rain
I would definitely recommend it. I could listen to it 24/7 if I was able to.
Been listening to Superchick alot to and a band called Casting Pearls. They are both a Christian band. I saw Casting Pearls in Sioux Falls, SD Sunday. They were super. The lead singer has a very unique voice and he’s very energetic. It was awesome.
I know I haven’t updated this thing lately. And I know I always say I’m going to try harder. If only things weren’t so crazy around here.
Xerxes is doing good. He’s the most adorable dog ever. If I knew how to put pictures on this blasted thing I would most definitely do it. Hmm… maybe I shall try that right now. Hold on… hmm, maybe some other time when it isn’t 12:30 in the morning and I’m not tired as heck. So, I’m going to end this right here and maybe try and figure something out after my hair cut. We shall see if I feel the urge.
Alissa