The good, the bad, the UGLY
Yea, I found a job. FINALLY!!! lol I start on August 1st which is ok. The guy has another girl that is leavin at that time, so it will make the transition smoother. He wants to start me at $11.50 an hour basically, which is $.50 more then what I was askin. Too kewl. The hours aren’t that bad either, M-F and instead of the 8-5 that I am used to, it is 8:30 -5 with a 30 min lunch, or I can do the 9-5 and no lunch. Either way, I am excited. I let him know that I don’t sell, and he was ok with that. And since my dad gave me $2000 to help me through the next 2 months. I should be fine till then. I am just glad that I finally got a job. Now the next month and a half will be more like a vacation then unemployment.
On to other issues. I went to lunch with my mom today, and got some news that I wasn’t too happy about. Let’s just say I did what I always do, I hit the roof. See, there’s this lady that used to be in my mom’s church till she recently got married and moved out of state. Durin the time that my mom had custody of my son, when he was age 2-3, she had enlisted the help of this friend to watch my son when she needed the help. Due to all this help, she ended up formin an "attachment" to my son. It caused a lot of problems fer awhile. I know I have mentioned her before, but her "attachment" to my son is one of the many reasons she and her first husband got a Divorce. She refused to back out when I came back into the picture, and it caused problems. Well, either way, I have still allowed her to see my son. At first it was because I needed the help. But after bout a year or 2, it mainly was because my son loves her, and she does care. Or so I thought anyway.
Over the past few years things have been happenin/comin out of the woodwork, sorta speak, that have made me second guess her involvement with my son. First off, let me say that she is Mormon, as is my mother, and that does play a part in all this. I found out a few years ago that she had written the "Bishop" in her’s and my mother’s church about her "concerns" fer my son. She insinuated that my mother was sexually assualtin my son, basically molestin him. I was appalled when I found this out. I also found out that, after I had asked her NOT to take my son to Disneyland, she took him anyway. She swore by all that was mighty that she didn’t remember me tellin her that. Either way, she screwed me out of it. She was able to to do ALL these things fer him that I couldn’t do, and I wanted that one thing. I wanted to be the one that took him to Disneyland his first time. I almost think she was tryin to rub it in my face that she could do things fer my son that I couldn’t do. On many occassions when she would have my son, it was specified as to what time she was to either drop him off at my mom’s, with me, or meet one of us to drop off my son. She was ALWAYS late. And gettin ahold of her was damn near impossible fer several hours. And when we finally would hear from her, she would act as though she fergot, or she couldn’t hear the phone ring, or whatever. There was even a time that she had taken my son to CA, with my permission of course, and was supposed to be back on a particular nite and time. When I didn’t hear fom her that nite I freasked out, like any mother would do. I started thinkin the worst had happened. Either an accident, or she had kidnapped my son. I finally heard from her the next day. Somethin had come up, I don’t remember now as it isn’t important, but they had to stay in town one more nite. She didn’t even bother to call me! I told her that I was ready to call the police and to never do that again, but it still continued. But yet, when it came time to pick him up, she was always on time.
Well, she recently got married and has moved out of state. We talked bout her spendin time with my son when she came down to visit and I told her I didn’t have a problem with that. Then she mentioned my son goin up there to spend a few weeks with them durin the summer. I told her that I would think about it, but I doubt I would go fer it. She at that point got upset, and asked, in a rather condescendin tone, why I would allow my son to go spend a week in New Mexico with my aunt and uncle, but not a couple weeks with her. Well, I have a couple reasons fer that one. Fer starters they are family, she is not. Not to mention that New Mexico is only a 3-4 hour drive. If anythin happened I would be able to get there easily. If I allowed my son to go with her, to IDAHO, what would I do if God forbid, somethin happened? I can’t afford a Red Eye flight, and I don’t know my way around that state. Plus I don’t think he is old enough to be flyin alone, I don’t care what anyone says! I think those are good enough reasons. The subject was dropped at that point.
The the other day my son got a letter from her. She was talkin bout all the things she has been doin. And, once again, brought up him goin there. But she mentioned it to HIM! Why in the Hell would she do that? Set my son up fer disappointment? She knows I am gonna say no!
Then today, the bomb was dropped. I went to lunch with my mom. I had mentioned the letter and what was said. My mom’s comment was that she didn’t think it was a good idea and that she wasn’t that happy with her right now and that she would tell me later. When we finished eatin, I finally asked her what she meant. I mean, she hasn’t had to deal with this lady since she married and moved, I have. Thus why I was confused. My mom began to explain to me that, yet once again, this woman had written the "Bishop" and expressed her "concerns" fer my son’s well bein. And the reason my mother knew this was cuz the "Bishop" called my m0m. First he asked bout my son not bein Baptized in the Church, my mom told him that that was somethin to discuss w/me, but it was doubtful. He was ok with that. Then he told my mom bout the letter. All he said was that this woman was "concerned." And apparently my mom wasn’t sure if she should tell me bout it. My brother, God love him, was soooo pisssed bout it that he wanted to tell me himself, but my mom made him promise not to, that she would tell me.
This all happened bout a month ago. And I am just now hearin bout it. I asked my mom why she didn’t tell me? Didn’t she think I had the right to know bout this? She said that yes I had the right to know. But knows me, she knew how I was gonna react. And she was right. I flew off the handle. But hey, don’t I have the right? I mean, this isn’t the first time this has happened. She had no right to do what she did. If she is THAT "concerned" I can’t help but wonder why and what is causin it. But part of me knows why. A part of her still thinks that she is gonna be able to get custody of my son. She still wants him. And she still thi
nks that she can take better care of him then I do.I mean it is common knowledge she feels this way. She has been told more then once that she needs to back out and move on. Any normal person would. Especially knowin that I am not givin him up. This just really pisses me off. I dunno what pisses me off more. The fact that she didn’t come to me bout her "concerns" and instead went behind my back bout her bein "concerned." Or that she is "concerned" over nuthin. And I don’t know if I should wait till she calls to ask me bout my son goin up there, or if I should call and confront her now bout it?
What do I do? I am sooo FUCKIN LIVID I can’t see straight. I know that if I call her now, I will chew her head off. But at the same time, if I wait, she will think I know nuthin bout this letter and her "concern."