01/03/2012

I am without a computer at home, and very rarely find myself at the studio with Scott, but here I am. i figured I would pop in to say that I am alive.

I have post partum depression. I’ve been taking medication since November 1st. Most days I don’t think it’s working. I try really hard to keep it together. It’s weird. I love Ian so much and can’t even begin tp understand why I feel this way. I should be going back to work tomorrow, but I’m not because of this. My disability has been extended. I never want to go back. I definitely can"t handle it right now. I’m crazy addicted to Ian. I would literally stay in  bed with him all day long. That’s the worst part of this thing.

I don’t feel like my life is my own.

So I was reading from my phone, but I’ve stopped because it saddens me too much. But I picked up a journal and am writing to keep my thoughts flowing.

My children are wonderful, and I’m trying to keep things good with my husband. My relationships are struggling unfortunately. I just care about very little other than my children.

I chopped all of my hair off. I wish I could share pictures.

Please keep me in your prayers, and know that I think of many of you daily!