12/26/2009

it is raining outside, rather heavily, and my clothes are quite damp as a result of going out in the weather and not removing them upon returning home.

anyway.

we have houseguests this week, friends of matt’s from OK. they’re nice enough, but no substitute for nick, who is trying his best to get through christmas across the country. it is quiet here without him, a bit too quiet. this is the kind of solitude for which i used to live; what happened to that version of me, i wonder? 

so i have been duly getting through the days by relaxing and sewing and watching movies in bed where it is warm and cozy and kind of like being curled up with nick. i miss him a bit less when i’m in bed, and also it reminds me of the old apartment, the likes of which i hope to someday inhabit again. i never really did take any pictures of it. the first several months it was an unorganized mess, which i whipped into shape just before graduation and my family’s visit. then a few months later there was nick, and two jobs, and things got busy and then i was never there and was over halfway moved out of the apartment by the time it occurred to me that i hadn’t really any pictures by which to remember it. now it exists in my mind as a sort of fantasy space. had matt moved out of the apartment over the summer, nick would have given this place up, and we would have contrived to remove the crazy ex-roommate and live happily ever there.

nick and i have been talking more about the future of late. things like commitment ceremonies and houses and kids. he wants to try and quit smoking by the time he finishes his PhD. we’re beginning to seriously tackle the looming task of the five of us living and working together. we’re getting organized. it’s kind of fun.

today i finished embroidering a tea towel for nick’s mom, and printed out and traced three new tea towels using designs i found online. i want to try my hand at making a few embroidered christmas ornaments, and would also like to try embroidering some mandalas for pillows, but that’s going to have to wait. i received a plethora of embroidery floss from lindsay and nick’s mom as christmas gifts, and am still trying to figure out where to put it, as my supply of blank floss-away bags has been utterly exhausted. gives me an excuse to venture to the upper west side to check out the michael’s, i suppose. today online i found an interesting-looking fabric store on the lower east side, which i would really like to check out this week, time permitting. in retrospect, OF COURSE there would be places to buy fabric and sewing notions in new york. not sure what i was thinking, or where i hadn’t looked, a year or so ago when i concluded no one in new york was crafty.