Summer quick uptdate

I haven’t been here for a while…again…but I had quite an emotional summer. It wasn’t bad but I’m really tired and I need a break.

It all was of course about that guy, it seems like a stupid reason to have an emotional summer but I didn’t plan it and it all happened suddenly…there was the time when I believed that we will be together, then time when I felt rejected, time when all that I was able to think of, was him, then the time when I gathered courage and finally talked to him, then the time when I finally realised that it might not work out and the time when I was for the first time able to accept that fact. Now it’s the time when I ‘m so tired of that emotional roll coaster that all I want is to have my normal life back and I have to admit it’s the time when I’ve realised that all that time when I was suffering it was the time when I was understanding my feelings wrongly. I thought I was so in love but the fact is that it was only my emotions and emotions where leading my life, so one day I felt happy then the other not. Once I’ve FINALLY realised that I decided to give up on him….to be honest I don’t want anything to happen, if it happens then OK but I’m not going to try any more or wait or hope or anuthing like again…I’m done….I think I don’t care any more, whatever! Such a relief actually!

My sister told me that when I meet the right person everything should go smoothly. I know it’s not always like this but when everything go the way that makes you feel you’re driving on the cobbled street and there is no end to that..I think that’s a sign that something is not right.

I feel now more free….I want to learn more, pick up Italian language again…and stop wasting my time on someone who I’m not even sure is interested in me…he sort of showed that but it all happened without actual contact or conversation, so I’m done with it!

Apart from that we’re having a very hot end of summer, the whole summer was exceptionally warm!

I’m also going to Poland on Monday so to recharged my batteries and spend some time with my aunt and cousin. I was hoping not to use Internet during my stay, to spend some time interent free, lets see…..I will only have internet on my mobile and also not all the time so maybe that will help me to stay away from it 🙂

Love to you all who still give a shit and take time to read my entries ;))) Thank You 🙂