fly me to the moon

So, I pretty much suck at being interesting. Because nothing I could say about my life right now would be intriguing in the slightest.

Whenever I lack inspiration, Alchera is there to make me think too hard & make me write something that doesn’t make sense.

Every now and then something will trigger a memory for me, one that I’d completely forgotten. Sometimes the trigger is a smell, a song or even just overhearing someone talking. Seeing as this happens to me a few times a month, at least, I hope it works like that for everyone else. If not, my apologies. Usually I remember something and then the next day I’ve completely forgotten about it again. So this month, if an old memory is triggered, try to write it down and then come back to it later, when you have the time, and free-write on it.

I never told anyone that I would google the lyrics in his profile to see what he was listening to. And then I’d download the songs, listen to them, and maybe get a little too obsessed with whatever band. But I think this happened once where the band was truly undeserving of my love & obsession. I still have all those songs on my computer (because I’ve pretty much stagnated on my love of music. help? who has blown you away lately & i’d really like it if there was a piano.), and everyone once in a while one of them will pop up on an old playlist in Winamp (which, hi, I have been changing once a week since I moved. is there a 12-step program for that?) so I’ll be swept back to whatever point I was when I first downloaded & listened to the song.

The funny thing is that, no matter how often I’ve listened to them since, I have very specific things attached to these. This is what we listened to when we cuddled on his bed (this was before I got a crush on him, actually) and Heather bitched at us because she was so jealous. And this one is the one I was listening to when he came and talked to me & make sure I was going out because if I wasn’t going, he wasn’t going. And then there was the song at the end of that movie that we didn’t really see the end of because that was the night it all kind of imploded. There are the songs from the day after. There are the songs from weeks after.

Every time I listen to those songs, I can remember exactly what I was wearing and exactly how I was feeling and exactly what I was doing. I associate so much more with music than I do with smells or colors or any of that. Probably because no matter how good I am at anything else, I can do nothing with music except listen.

Hi, my name is Sarah and I can’t freewrite. No no no.

On the plus side, pictures of my new apartment hopefully soon-ish? Or maybe not, since I am horrible at being on OpenDiary.