Today’s Theology Lesson

I am waxing philisophical today….that – and someone e-mailed me this little gem.  Given my particular background of ALMOST being brough up Jewish….I laughed myself silly.  Enjoy

The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single oy.
 

If you wish to know The Way, don’t ask for directions. Argue.

Take only what is given. Own nothing but your robes and an alms bowl
unless, of course, you have the closet space.

Let your mind be as a floating cloud. Let your stillness be as the wooded
glen. And sit up straight. You’ll never meet the Buddha with posture like
that.

There is no escaping karma. In a previous life, you never called, you never
wrote, you never visited. And whose fault was that?

Wherever you go, there you are. Your luggage is another story.

To practice Zen and the art of Jewish motorcycle maintenance, do the
following: get rid of the motorcycle. What were you thinking?

Learn of the pine from the pine. Learn of the bamboo from the bamboo. Learn
of the kugel from the kugel.

Be aware of your body. Be aware of your perceptions. Keep in mind not every
physical sensation is a symptom of a terminal illness.

If there is no self, whose arthritis is this?

Breathe in. Breathe out. Breathe in. Breathe out. Forget this, and
attaining Enlightenment will be the least of your problems.

The Tao has no expectations. The Tao demands nothing of others. The Tao
does not speak. The Tao does not blame. The Tao does not take sides. The Tao is not Jewish.

Drink tea and nourish life. With the first sip, joy. With the second,satisfaction. With the third, Danish.

The Buddha taught that one should practice loving kindness to all sentient beings. Still, would it kill you to find a nice sentient being who happens to be Jewish?

Be patient and achieve all things. Be impatient and achieve all things faster.

To find the Buddha, look within. Deep inside you are ten thousandflowers. Each flower blossoms ten thousand times. Each blossom has ten thousand petals. You might want to see a specialist.

Be here now. Be someplace else later. Is that so complicated?

Zen is not easy. It takes effort to attain nothingness. And then what do you have? Bupkes. (translation: nada, zip)