Position Closed, Withdrawn, Reneged, Canceled….

Sometimes my mind warps into another dimension and I do and/or say strange things. My last diary entry is an example of the type of thing I say when my brain is out for intermission.

I woke up this morning and vaguely remembered writing something so I went back and checked my diary. Oh piffle! Did I really write THAT??!!? With great trepidation I went to check my e-mail. Whew! Nothing there. I didn’t really expect any replies to my job posting, but you never know what may happen.

Next I settled in to read my notes. As always they were a source of joy, laughter, amazement. advice and food for thought. In case I haven’t said it before – the brand of people found in these cyber-pages is top notch, A-1 and more than a cut above. I decided to Lincoln the Love Doctor’s advice and check out love.com.

Whoo baby did I have a selection of mean arrayed there – just ripe for the pickings. I treated it as my own personal Monster.com job locator service. First cut at the more than 1500 entries that met my general search selections eliminated those folks that typed only in CAPITAL LETTERS and used cutsie abbreviations such as I M 4 U. Call it arbitrary, but I had to start somewhere. Then I weeded out all the ones that required “discretion” or a certain brand of “free thinking”. After the first two cullings, I had eliminated roughly 100 hopefuls. The next cut was made for me…..all fellows but who refused to judge a book by it’s content and were hung up on the cover were gone. They got points for honesty but, as they would not be interested in someone who is neither slim, nor average nor athletic in build, they were off the list. There were still over 1000 applications to choose from. I was feeling overwhelmed.

I started reading through a few entries. There were plenty of guys who had high opinions of themselves. Nowhere did I see even the slightest evidence of a self-esteem problem. So tell me, what are so many perfect, “real” men who have average to good physiques, a love of music and romance doing loose in the Atlanta area? And, amazingly, they are all different from other men I may have been involved with – every last one of those 1000 is different from all other men in the world. They said so and they wouldn’t lie or embellish. They are all searching for true love, their soul mate or someone to complete themselves.

I exercised my next search option – I looked for any mention of kilt-wearing. Bingo! Problem solved – I had successfully eliminated each and every one of them. What a relief.

So, here’s the scoop. I’m really pretty ok with who I am and where I am in life right now. There’s good days and bad days, but the bad days are of my making and are really chances to learn. I’m learning. I feel complete – not like I need another person to complete me. I have my kids and a handful of friends who are wonderful, as well as a few who are not so wonderful, but they’re my friends anyway. I know that I have much work to do on me personally and a very demanding job. There’s just no room for anyone else…..and that’s OK. It’s better than OK – it’s as it should be right now.

What I really need is someone to come clean my apartment – no benefits, no long term commitments – but cash on the barrel head! A soul mate? Not at the moment. A maid? You betcha!!!!!