friends

so I posted this note to my facebook. I dont know if it was the right thing to do because I think its really gonna piss a few people off but its how I’m feeling so I let it out….

So it has gotten to the point that I am afraid to say no to anyone. I never say no and when i do the "friend" (not just one in particuar) gets mad at me. Even though I’ve just helped a million times before i said no. Its like the majority of my friendships are based on what i can do for the other person. It is very rare that anyone calls me just to say "hey how are you today" its always can you or will you. No one ever just comes to hang out with me. Its "hey if I stop by can you do this for me" Dont get me wrong I LOVE feeling useful its part of my personality. I dont want anyone to read this and think they cant ask for help if they need it. I welcome it. I’m just saying dont get mad if I cant for whatever reason. Dont forget my name or that I exist unless you need something. I am not on here trying to talk trash about anyone or trying to start drama. I’m on here asking please just be my friend because you enjoy being around me and enjoy my company or dont be my friend at all. I have no idea how many friends i’ll lose by saying this, but I feel like I must say it. And I dont want any messages or comments asking if I’m talking about you. If you feel the need to ask that means I probably am. Once again, I’m not being mean and if this was just to one person I would talk to them directly. I think the problem is, it is to several people. It makes me sad. I love each and every one of my friends dearly. As you all read this please remember that. And I hope to talk to you all very soon.
 
 
I dont know if this is a childish way to feel. I dont know if this is the christian way to feel. all i now is i’m exhausted.