My Cartoon

"Be blissfully happy, dammit. Over stupid things like cartoons" ~ Rachael Renee

I have to find my cartoon.

This Saturday I’m going out for girlie afternoon lunch with Andrea and Carmen. And I’m really looking forward to that. It will be lovely, it will be wonderful.

On Saturday night me and my Bebe will go see a movie for the sake of VDay and the excuse it demands to do something together as a couple, and celebrate your love in some way or another. We love going to the movies every now and then, perhaps every 6mths. And the movies it shall be. And I’m really looking forward to that too.

Sunday is my Daddy’s birthday. Nothing has been planned, but I imagine that we will all gather and meet and be the Wimmers that we are. And share and commune and laugh, and be silly together, and have a million kids running around the house, including little blonde girls.

This Sunday is also Jemima’s 2nd bday celebration, with a Garden Theme. We’re supposed to dress up. Perhaps I should find something green? I had thought Kelly would celebrate the following weekend (like she did last year – oh remember last year?) but she’s doing it early this year. I’m not sure if we’ll go or not. I have mixed feelings. Anything for Jemima, but for Kelly ?

I also wonder and bother and fuss over the possibility of Andy being there…

Which by the way, he hasn’t written back yet. And I almost wish that he wouldn’t. I’m cringing at the thought. I almost don’t want to see him now. It’s like it’s been far too long since our last meet… I don’t know. I am silly. I have my personal fears about our next meeting, whenever that may be. And perhaps he hasn’t responded because he assumes he’ll see me at Jemima’s bday anyway. I don’t know…

I have a ‘catch-up’ with Veeay after lunch. I wrote back to his meeting request saying "Last meeting was not a ‘catch-up’. Can you please tell me what this meeting is in relation to please?" So he told me that it’s still related to my punctuality (and lack thereof).

I’m South-American, give me a break. Time is not a concept to me. I WILL ALWAYS be a few minutes late. Hahaha.

The truth is that I have no emotional strength these days. I am HIT full-bull with this stupid FUCKING depression that hits every now and then. It hadn’t hit for a long time… And then all of a sudden, whoosh! It sweeps me under its horrid torrential wave… I hate it… I always try so hard to analyse where this complete lacklustre comes from – and there is never ANY reason for it !!! It’s so frustrating because I feel so flat, and so lifeless, and just so so sad….

I really have to find my cartoon.

And yes, I am totally looking forward to our Trip : ) And I’m looking forward to discussing it in detail with Tom tomorrow. And also, Mum has a Tupperware Party tomorrow night that we’ll drop into. We’ll probably order a something because we need more containers. Maybe just one container for $20 for now.

I love my Babe. I love him so so so much. He is a wonderful wonderful man… He is beautiful…

Silly boy. He’s finally finished his sudoku book. He has spent every waking minute on that goddamned book. But since an OD friend pointed out he might have some of ADHD, where people have to concentrate on things for long periods, I kinda understand it. And it’s okay, it doesn’t bother me. It’s something new about him that I hadn’t been aware of before. And I accept it. If he needs to concentrate on things for ages to feel alive, then so be it. Geek.

Haha,.

I love him. I love him just so much.