Not Well

I am having a great deal of trouble eating.

There is so much fear surrounding food. And so much deadness inside of me.

But I am scared where this is heading.

I had to cancel our long-awaited relationship counselling session last night, because I was feeling so dissociated and head spacey (weird) that I was literally sick/dizzy/ not okay. I needed someone to talk to, or sit with me.  I am upset I had to cancel. WE need the counselling desperately.

Feeling head sick and dissociated…..there are very few people I can call. And having anyone visit is not possible.

Damien came home eventually. It got a bit better.

And today is ANOTHER day. I don’t know if I can do this all over aGAIN.

And then there’s tomorrow.

I don’t know how long I can do this for.