Trabajar

    Whew, things have been pretty crazy lately. Work has been unusually busy for the winter. The only explanation I can give is that we have had an extremely mild winter and people have been more free to travel.  They also have been free to be complete jerks. Especially the elder generation. I thought maybe I was coming off as rude and unhelpful, because it seemed like every customer was giving me attitude. I didn’t FEEL like I was being rude with people but I figured it had to be me if I was having so many issues with people. I was genuinely worried about myself! Turns out one of my coworkers (who is too new to complain) said she’s been having problems with the older generation being just downright mean. My response? “Oh thank God you too. I thought it was just me!” So the nursing homes need to take back their residences so I can stop considering Prozac. It can just get so discouraging to be yelled at all the time.

DB nearly lost his job. Right now he is hanging on by the tiniest thread. One little mess up and I am sure he is out the door. In the past few weeks he has raked up so many points because he goes out and drinks, and drinks, and drinks so much that he calls into work the next morning (or doesn’t call in and doesn’t show.) He is just spiraling out of control. It sucks to watch a train about to crash and you can do nothing about it but just stand there paralyzed and watch in horror. Saturday he showed up to work and he got called into the GM’s office and they had a chat. After work he met me at my car to talk about what went down, which basically turned out to be he’d find out Monday if he got to keep his job or not. He was upset and tense ALL day after the meeting and he could only be upset with himself. He did that. No one else is responsible for his actions. Despite THAT logic, I worried for him anyway. I didn’t want to see him lose a good job. I felt his anger at himself, I felt his fear of losing his job and what that would mean and, I felt his remorse.

When I got home I shot him a text and said if he needed a friend and didn’t want to be alone he could come over and we could rent a movie and order a pizza or something. I knew he’d head straight for the bar after work on Saturday to try and kill his nerves.  Which he did, and after 1 beer he called me up to see if the offer still stood. He came over and we just hung out. I let him talk and vent about himself. I couldn’t really offer words of comfort because what can I say that he doesn’t already know? “Well you really fucked yourself dude….maybe you should STOP drinking and seek help…”  He already knows what he did. I don’t think we are at a place in our strange friendship where I could just lay things like that out on the table. He’s a smart man (even though his actions sometimes speak otherwise) and he knows he has a problem.  I personally thought the GM was putting the fear of God into him (so to speak) by making him wait three days to find out if he gets to keep his job or not. Somehow I just didn’t feel like this was the end for him job-wise.  I think if you had it in mind to fire some- one you’d just do it you know?  There were some sad silences where I could tell he was scared to death and I had nothing to say.  B was super pissed with me for inviting him over. She thinks I am letting him drag me into his dark world but, it didn’t feel like that. I would be there for her if she were doing the same stupid shit.  He and I didn’t sleep together, he didn’t spend the night, and I didn’t invite him over with those intentions. I just felt he needed a friend you know? According to her I should not be his friend or anything else. She is thoroughly disgusted by him and I guess I can’t blame her.  I can’t help it when I care for some one.  I don’t want to take on his problems, but I can’t just stand by and watch some -one suffer either. Even if it’s their own fault.

 Monday rolled around and he was SUPER antsy and tense, and a bit short with me.  Sunday he was like that too, but I didn’t really take offense because I knew where it was coming from. He called the front desk from the maintenance shop and whispered that he got to keep his job all giddy like a kid. That night he got trashed in celebration.  The thin ice he’s skating on is melting fast…it’s too bad.

On a BRIGHTER note. B’s promotion finally came through and it turns out I am getting  her supervisor position. All four of the salaried managers decided I would be the best fit for the job and have already started showing me how to do certain tasks. The title isn’t official yet of course, and there are going to be some coworkers who aren’t going to be happy about being passed over, which isn’t something I am thrilled about dealing with. I am certain they will think I got the promotion because B and I are such good friends.  The GM doesn’t really do that though. He hires people who he knows will do the job and do it right. If he hires people he can count on to have follow-through that means less work and babysitting of his staff for him. So when he approached me Friday to talk about it I was honored and I knew the promotion was real. He told me he hoped he didn’t have to post the position and could just slide me right in, but if he has to post it and other people apply, to make sure I make it known I am applying too.  

Soooooooo in the next few weeks she will be moving on to another property and I will be sliding into her seat. I am excited and nervous. It means another raise which isn’t too shabby. Better hours. Unless we are short on desk coverage, I will only act as back up and hopefully won’t have too many 7 am shifts or evening shifts where I get off at 11. I think I am most excited about that. It’s something different than working the desk constantly. I’ll even have my OWN desk in the back office which is cool too! It’s a change that is definitely needed.  I have worked really hard on myself in the past year with my physical appearance, and my efforts at work and my personal life. I feel valued, and content for the most part. I can’t tell the future but I definitely feel like it’s going somewhere good. I am intent on focusing on that.