Catch Up

Well, I haven’t written in here in a long time. Not that any one was reading it anyway, lol. But I will go ahead write anyway. I’ve missed writing.  I have written a few poems again. They are a bit rusty but it felt good to produce something for a change, thats for sure.

Frank and I are still doing great. We’re both super busy with our homework and different projects. I’ve been workin my butt off here at work because the manager has gone senile and keeps firing people she hires. I know my job is pretty much safe, but I feel bad for all her victims. Anyway, Frank and I are supposed to see eachother in Jan, and I am pretty excited. I have missed him a great deal, I haven’t even got to hug him since August 22nd. Distance certainly isn’t easy in a relationship, but it makes for awesome make up visits, 😉

Lately, much to my check book’s dismay, I have become addicted to shopping at Victoria’s Secrets….I buy buy buy, and I am running myself into the ground. I have a nice collection of clothes and unmentionables to show for it though, hehe. It just feels so nice to wear nice, quality clothing, and not some outfit I picked out at Walmart or something. I’ve always been too poor to afford really nice clothes that I feel pretty in.  Some people drink…smoke….hoe around..I have VS addiction…hehe. I guess it could be worse…I never really buy anything for myself, and now I feel a little guilty about plurging.

Work is really chaotic and stressful right now.  My boss is annoyingly anal about everything. She’s leaving petty notes instead of just telling us our mistakes to our face. She talks about us employees behind eachother’s backs. I have become good friends and she hates it. I am sure she knows she and I bond together and talk about her and plot her death, lol. She’s so unbelievably tacky and rude to us desk clerks. The other day she was even name calling. The whole situation is horrible, and it is no wonder why no one has stayed the past year to work here. Everyone either quits or they aren’t some one whose reliable and they get fired. It is getting very frustrating and I notice the anger, bittnerness and stress affecting me. I have become a lot less patient, I am not as friendly, I am tired all the time, and I don’t get enough sleep. I feel bad for poor Frank, because other than school and work, nothing else is going on in my life to talk about, so he gets a lot of venting from me regarding this job.  I know he’s tired of it, I am tired of it, but he listens anyway. I would definately quit if I didn’t feel like I was letting the owner down. He kind of babys me and relies on me a lot…if I quit I feel like I’d be letting us both down by not sticking through it. He knows how my manager is, he said when he got back from India he’d fix things…whatever that means.

To top it off I kind of had a hand in getting a girl fired. Granted, she pulled the stunts, but after a while I got tired of it and played tattle tale.   She would constantly show up late for work (which wouldn’t be a big deal if I didn’t live an hour away and had to be up at 6 and in class at 8 every morning…), there were two instances in the past month where she didn’t call and didn’t show.  Few nights ago she was trying to sell me drugs and I watched her steal a shirt out of the back office. Money was always coming up missing out of the drawer on her shift.  Well I told my friend at work about how she offered me pills and that friend told the boss…and the boss isn’t too happy with this girl anyway, she has wanted to fire her for some time…but I kept telling her not to, that maybe she’d straighten out. But  my boss was like NO, I want her fired right now. Granite she did things herself that caused her to lose her job, but I don’t like being part of the reason. Now she’s calling asking why I wanted her fired. I didn’t want her fired, I wanted her to get scared so she’d straighten up and do her job right and quit putting me in a corner. Even the past two pay days she has asked me for money. Which I thought was odd because she got a check the same day I did.   I don’t like being taken advantage of though. Everyone who knows the situation says I shouldn’t feel guilty, but I do anyway. I told my boss not to fire her. And to top it off, when my boss fired her, she TOLD this girl I was the one who confessed everything. Which wasn’t true at all. My boss should have left me out of the firing lecture and based it on her quality of work and lack there of. But like I said, my boss has no tact.

But thats what is current at my place of work. Its all a big mess and I am so unhappy. I don’t know why I stay really. But I work hard too, so why should a slacker get all the breaks when I bust my ass for em? I keep telling myself not to feel guilty, my head knows I have no reason to….but it nags at me anyway. Im so ready for a vacation…